"My loan officer said you would be bringing the checks today" and of course it's a refinance with a three day right of recision.
The borrower chases you down the driveway as you are pulling away yelling "Where is our check? You forgot to give us our check. Our loan officer said you would have our check", and of course its another refinance with a another three day right of recision.
"My loan officer couldn't explain how he came up with those numbers, he said you would explain it".
"I'm sorry my house is messy, we had company over the weekend", as you find yourself standing in the middle of a full-blown hoarder house waiting for the camera crew to show up and you are in the latest episode of Hoarders.
"Be careful, my dog might bite you", as you sit at the kitchen table paralyzed with fear that Cujo the Chihuahua is going to take a bite out of your leg, or better yet, "He won't hurt you", as Tiny the not-so-tiny dog is barking and growling at you from across the room.
"I hope you're not allergic to cats", as you walk into the house and there is cat fur everywhere and you see cats scattering in all directions trying to hide.
On a side note though . . . different story . . . and I've told this story to a few of my notary friends before . . . and we all know you can't make this stuff up. A few years ago I went to a home and along the wall of the dining room were seven dual tray pet dishes all lined up neatly in a row. I just assumed they had a few dogs and a few cats. I made a comment that they must have a few pets roaming around. Much to my surprise they said "we have 14 cats". I couldn't believe it. The house didn't have a bit of cat hair anywhere, you couldn't smell anything remotely cat related, and during my time at their home signing paperwork, I never once saw a cat. They told me that for several years they have adopted older unwanted cats. Sweetest couple you would ever want to meet. I still remember sitting in their dining room as if it were yesterday hearing about their sweet cats that were just like their children.
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