Posted by Sylvia_FL on 9/24/06 7:06pm
Msg #148278

OT: Chain Letter Overload

Dear Friends,

I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send
me your chain letters over the past two years. Thank you for making me
feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Because of your concern...

I no longer drink anything out of a can because I will get sick from the
rat feces and urine.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could get
pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer causing deodorants even though I smell like a wet
dog on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually
Al Qaida bombs in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our
American troops.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a
stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hades with calls
to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant
freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer date the opposite sex because they will take my kidneys and
leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have
their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking
out for me.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is
about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive
the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in
their special e-mail program.

Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me! I
will now return the favor.

If you DON'T send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60
seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will poopy on your head at 5:00 pm
tomorrow afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened
to a friend of a friend of a friend.

Reply by Jon on 9/24/06 8:38pm
Msg #148283

I don't have 1200 people in my address book! Anyone know where I can get a lot of email addy's really fast?!?!?

Thanks in advance for your help

Reply by Sylvia_FL on 9/24/06 8:50pm
Msg #148287

LOL Jon
I don't believe I have 1200 in my address book either

Reply by Cassandra Harris on 9/24/06 8:42pm
Msg #148285

I know what you mean

I accidentally opened one from a friend who typed in don't open this. Now I know why. It was a horrible message which I of course had to repost, but I put in bold caps, DO NOT OPEN HORRIBLE CHAIN LETTER ATTACHED> NOT JOKING. Hopefully no one opened it. I'll take my chances with the large bird and I'll keep you posted.

Reply by AngelinaAZ on 9/24/06 11:47pm
Msg #148310

Re: I know what you mean

Oh lord... was that the one about 'someone near you will die' if you don't send it out to 15 people and had all the 'true' death horror testimonials attached of the people that didn't forward it?

I was so pissed when I read it... I don't have the type of friends that take kindly to those things forwarded so if I sent it... I'd probably BE STRANGELED by one of them. Either way... it was going to end badly!

Reply by cassiewi on 9/24/06 11:53pm
Msg #148311

Re: I know what you mean

Yes, that was it. It wasn't an email though, it was posted in the bulletins of my space, I tried to make it very clear not to open it. I don't normally respond to these things, but that one was horrible, and I'm with you, I was pissed. Stupid for me to even give it thought, but oh well. Over and done with.

Reply by Kathleen/CA on 9/24/06 10:02pm
Msg #148298

So maybe thats what Chicken Little meant when he said The Sky is falling?

Reply by TitleGalCA on 9/24/06 11:21pm
Msg #148308

Sylvia, ty4 "guilt relief" I think it's worse much worse now

Every single freakin time I get those emails I do hesitate just one second before hitting Delete....
You see - if I DON'T forward the email to 50 of my friend and family (?Who has Fifty?) then I will suffer bad luck, plagues of pestulance and boils, and proabably grasshoppers for 10 years.

Those emails are quite terrifying, so I ALWAYS DO what they tell me...it's the only SAFE way to be. The consequences are just too terrible!

But now I'm wondering why everyone in my (fifty plus) family and co-workers don't respond to a single thing I send them.....? Are they in for the same plagues and tribulations that I avoided by hitting delete? Are they looking to me as harbinger of misery? (well if all these emails were true it could be ya know. I suggest everyone looks HARD at their family to determine whether you want these eamils or not. I could a matter of life and death. Which members will serve you? Which members will betray you? This could be verrrrrrry important.

Oh great. Now I'm not only responsible for my family but a bunch of others too....Plagues will come upon them because they didn't send MY email! (Ouch! that means me too)

At this point? I look at like have no luck whatsover for the next 20 years. This doesnt' surprise me as there (at this VERY minute of writing this post) there is a Union Paficic Rail Train intent on making the MOST noise he can in order to disturb my Sunday evening, and could in fact run arail and charge full speed into my apartment building, which of course - will kill me.

So....now that I have TWO confirmed threats to my death? Well, the clearly obvious reason speeks for itself: I do know the answers......in order:

If I walk down a street or lane alone I have my dog, we walk with a confident and assertive air and "own" the space we are walking....You see it is all about ATTITUDE and the owner attitude moves into the phsyche and mind of your Dog. (ROUGH TRANSLATION: The dog is a wuss so it's up to me. I walk with my head UP, and with resolve and serious intention. Anyone looking at me and the Chi would go.....uh, not an easy hit. Forget the chihuahua, I don't want to mess with that lady that has some-pissed-off-ness about her in the walk. Jorge! Go to the next street....ondolay, ondolay!!! There is a poodle two streets over that is just asking for a good butt poundin'.

It is.....all about Jungle Love......(unless your past 60 or so) Then it becomes outright cooersion (cars, boats, stack of bonds and a safe (with those magical things in them) That will sway a normally indepenced lady to decide the "team" is the best parternship.