Posted by Karla/OR on 8/1/12 1:24pm
Msg #428977

Could have been worse . . .

Got up at 5:30 a.m. this morning to make it to a 8 a.m. signing 1.5 hours drive away. So far so good, it's a beautiful drive.

I arrived at the signing location only to find out from renters that the borrower lives in Washington state - I am in Oregon!!! I called the SS to advise - discussed and agreed upon trip and print fees.

It was truly a blessing that the signing did not take place - the setting for this property was beautiful, right on a river. The interior, however, was a Capital "F" FILTHY Pigsty. Right out of deliverance!! The sad part was that this man had two children there - a girl who looked to be about middle school age and a boy who looked to be high school age. What a wonderful role model the father is NOT!!

I was more than happy to get back in my car and enjoy the beautiful drive back home.

Stopped on the way home and did some retail therapy!! :O)

Reply by CJ on 8/1/12 1:57pm
Msg #428984

I don't understand filthy houses.

My house is not pristine, but I am in and out all day with work. For people who are home all day and able-bodied, I don't understand why they don't look around and say, "I think I'll try to make a dent in this mess". Even if they just throw out the trash and wash the dirty dishes, it would be a BIG improvement for some people.

Reply by BrendaTx on 8/2/12 6:57am
Msg #429078

Re: I don't understand filthy houses.

I just need to mention this. I hate filth. But, when one's surroundings are in a terrible mess--the kind of mess that takes more than a full day or two and dumpster to clean up, it is not a choice. There is a mental, physical, substance abuse, or emotional problem.

We've all seen bachelor pads that need a going over or a home where there is chaos, dishes, and the toilet needs a scrubbing. But, I'm talking about the kinds of homes that are discussed here. When I have seen this kind of filth, I recognize that there is a problem that the people in charge are unable to overcome. To get the place cleaned up will require professional treatment of whatever ails them. Depression, substance abuse, and mental illness are often hidden until you see a person's home.

I used to park in parking lot where a professional woman dressed neat as a pin emerged from a vehicle that was obviously the car of a hoarder--disgusting and full of stuff up to the roof of the car interior in places. A 70 yr old man was recently removed from a nearby home after he fell. It was a shock that the home was full of evidence of hoarding. This man holds a PhD and a world known microbiologist because of a patent that he holds and has held since 1979. As I tracked his history when I was asked to look for someone to contact abouthis health, I learned that he moved across the country became a student at age 40 and received his PhD when he was around 50. Remarkable.

These people usually do not have a choice about the filth and are imprisoned by something we usually cannot see. The man mentioned above is getting help and therapy.

Reply by Susan Fischer on 8/2/12 9:36am
Msg #429087

Excellent post. Over the years, I've seen some incredible

situations - and in some, almost impossible to overcome to complete.

My take is, I'm walking into someone else's life. I am no judge, and find that acting completely unsurprised; using a short focus on *something* cool, or beautiful, or unusual, to break the ice; and finding a work-around as a matter of course, gets the job done.

My heart breaks for the hoarders, and living with one gives me a whole other perspective on the challenges they face every second of every day.

In one tiny house, the small kitchen table was dwarfed by the outside-sized garbage can (unlidded) next to it - stunk to high heaven, and was one of the l o n g e s t signing ever, it seemed. Actually, it flew by according to the clock... bleah.

Reply by bfnotary on 8/2/12 10:44am
Msg #429095

Re: I don't understand filthy houses.

Not always, some people are just lazy. There is not an excuse for everything in this world. Pure laziness is one reason. I am not saying that may always be the case, but yes sometimes it is a choice. A choice to be lazy.

Reply by BrendaTx on 8/2/12 10:30pm
Msg #429179

Re: I don't understand filthy houses.

Very interesting statements.

"...some people are just lazy"

I remember when I used to be that certain about things that I found to be distasteful, different, or troubling. It was a lot easier. Enjoy it while you can and I'm not kidding.

Wisdom is not all that it is cracked up to be.

Reply by JanetK_CA on 8/4/12 3:32am
Msg #429315

Re: I don't understand filthy houses.

Very well said, Brenda! Judging is much easier than understanding.

I've nearly always found that whenever I take the time or make the effort to look beyond the surface of a situation, I find something I didn't expect. There's nearly always more to things than what meets the eye.

It's true about what we do, as well. To people on the other side of the table, it may look like we just "flip and stamp" as I think someone here called it, but we know it's not that simple. Same goes for people, so maybe we should be careful about making hasty judgments about others or simplistic assumptions... We have no idea what they may be dealing with.

Reply by Frank/NC on 8/1/12 2:01pm
Msg #428985

I had something similar to that happen 6-7 months ago. Unfortunately, the borrowers were home but the place was so terribly filthyand stunk of urine and feces, I refused to do the signing and advised the borrowers of exactly that. I offered to sign at the local McDonalds but they never showed up. However, I did report the situation to the Board of Health in that there were 3 children in the house that appeared not to have bathed in months. I also notified the Title company that I was reporting the place to the Board of Health. The interesting part of this is the co-borrower was empoyed as an inspector by the Board of Health. I don't think anything ever came of it but I couldn't walk away from children being abused in that manner.

Reply by Linda Juenger on 8/1/12 2:24pm
Msg #428990

Learned the hard way once too with not confirming the address of the location of the signing.

Reply by Karla/OR on 8/1/12 2:37pm
Msg #428994

Yep, once is usually all it takes too! This particular SS gives specific instructions not to contact the borrower. The funny thing is that the error could have been discovered earlier than today - the SS called yesterday to see if it was an issue for me to change the arrival time from 9 a.m. to 8 a.m. So they obviously talked to the BO yesterday. No one is immune from mistakes - I'm sure the scheduler felt bad.

Reply by Karla/OR on 8/1/12 2:31pm
Msg #428993

@CJ~ I don't get it either. If people are unemployed, poor, or whatever their predicament is, I so feel for them - I've been in both positions. As I've said on this forum before, it does not give them a license to be SLOBS.

@Frank~ I hope I have the b$%%s to do what you did if I ever experience that sort of thing again. Maybe today's experience was a rehearsal for what is to come! I'm so glad for this forum which provides such valuable real-life situations and how to handle them professionally.

Reply by Frank/NC on 8/1/12 6:30pm
Msg #429017

Karla,
I don't know if it requires anything other than seeing 3 kids who are so filthy dirty living in that type of environment which is really nothing more than child abuse. They don't deserve the diseases that could be lurking there. BY the way, what I forgot to mention is the moron from the TC whose only thought and question to me was when I called them, "Isn't there any way you could get it done quickly and get out so we could get this closed?"