Posted by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 7:32pm
Msg #57023

Okay - Here is my $50 signing story...

Hello...today was WAKE UP CALL DAY. Not another one for $50 ever ever ever. I needed to be reminded.

Understand that the reason I took this particular one from an SS is because it was a Navy Federal...and the scheduler kept shreiking that at me until I believed I had to take it.

It was last minute yesterday...they requested 8 am or before. I suppose I figured I should do it as a courtesy to the borrowers...but I did say I would NOT do it at 8 am this morning for $50. Sure glad I did that much!

I kept telling the scheduler that I required $75, and she said BUT IT'S NAVY FEDERAL! I say, so what's that got to do with it? What's a Navy Federal? Those are not everywhere around here in Texas.

CAN'T YOU DO A NAVY FEDERAL FOR $50???? IT IS A REALLLLYY LITTLE PACKAGE!

Okay...they are military, I am thinking...it was the first NF Heloc I have seen. It was on a CA property. To me, the military are heroes.

So, I took the $50.00 appointment, and the scheduler from the SS was correct about the docs.

The package was tiny. But, here is the letter I sent the SS after the signing. I just faxed it to them.

---------My Letter to the $50.00 SS-----------
I probably should not tell you guys this whole story, but it is humorous, so I will tell it. Mr. Bwr said it best, you'll see when you read this. This is just a little slice of what notaries deal with "out there."

AFTER THE documents were signed I contacted TITLE CO and gave them the tracking while still at the borrowers...just as your instructions say I must do or have my fee reduced.

Jane was correct, this package was very small and I accepted $50 in spite of my better judgment. I knew better. True - The package itself was not really worth more than $50, but the appointments are NOT just about papers...they are also about PEOPLE. And, every time I let one slide at $50, this is the kind of thing that happens.

PROBLEM #1 - The borrower waited until 12:40 am this morning to return my confirmation call. That was no problem, except my cable was out and I need the cable to download eDocs. (Not yours, another appointment.)

I was trying to get someone looking into it before I went to bed. I had been on hold for 25 minutes waiting for the next available representative.

And, then the borrower beeped in.

I started not to answer, as late as it was, I guess I wasn't thinking clearly and must have feared it was some kind of "notary emergency" since it was the borrower's number.

No. No emergency, just a call back to confirm at **12:40 am. **

She thought I'd be asleep. (I am thinking, so WHY would you call?)

But I say, "Okay thanks," and I try to end the call, but she insists on giving me directions to her house. I tried to ask her if I could call back this morning. Nope, not no but HExx no - we must do directions NOW, ...had to take them right then. Says she, "I just really wanted to go ahead really quick while we were on the phone."

So...I lost my turn with the cable people after my 25 minute wait. Everyone was calling in across town...No matter...all in the day of a notary signing agent...what's another 25 minutes at 1:00 am. ?


PROBLEM #2 - As it turns out, there was about 15 more miles than I anticipated. My bad...I need to never take $50 appointments and that will not matter.

The borrower's house is really not in MyTown, Texas which...that's just the "mail" address.

Bwrs live on the outskirts of the next little town. A bit further than anticipated. Okay...that's fine. I'll eat that one, too.

But, when I get there...I realize what we have is a very small, very compact and tightly wound control freak borrower (female gender).

PROBLEM #3 - Ms. Bwr had the docs in her hands when I got there. SHE remained in control of them permanently. It was that, or I knock her down and grab them. She was really small, and I think I could have taken her if I had sucker punched her. However, she is a military gal...and no way I could have done anything on a fair fight. So...that's where the docs stayed...in her control.

After signing, Mrs. Bwr refuses to allow me to have the documents to drop off. She does not want to let ME call TITLE CO SHE wants to call her loan offier. SHE wants to call TITLE CO. I did not give in on that one!!

SHE wants to drop them to make SURE they get out today. Okay. That required an extra call to You-SS, and an extra call to TITLE CO as per you-SS to get permission to allow her to take the documents.

Still...SHE wants to call her loan officer. I don't care, just let me get finished and go. I wanted to take a look at the entire package just once because you have six pages of instructions that warn me of all kinds of folly I can run into. But what happened was, SHE snatched YOUR SIX PAGES of instructions from ME! But, she relented on those and she did allow me to regain possession of my instructions before I left.

The bwr never did allow me have the entire package to search through JUST to see what I might be missing.

Instead, she wants to know what I am looking for, I tell her I need to see any instructions regarding faxing which may have come in the package. No. Nothing is in there...she's very sure of it. She's not turning loose.

Her husband even tells her to give me the documents. Stupid man...No, no, no...she's going to drop it off on her way to work. Then, she decides the label MUST have more information on it. She removes it and adds their names to the label. I asked her not to; and, the husband said to leave it alone. She said it HAS TO BE CORRECT and I want our name on the label.

Well...Okay, by that time she wins the whole pile of chips from me. I am done.

Her controlling nature is a beast and I am not going to argue --at that point, it's like $50 - $40 - $9.95 what difference does it make? I am in the hole...on this one anyhow.

I just would like to wrap this up because she's getting way too nosy about my life...I have a feeling...and, yes, I knew this was coming... I am right...

PROBLEM #4 - I **knew** she would ask me the the dreaded question that I seldom get from anyone except transplants from California:

"How can I become a notary? How can I do this part time?"

So I told her to start with her notary commission. And, I just want to get the heck out of there.

Then she said: "Well, how much are you getting paid to do this job today?" I told her I was not supposed to discuss that, really. She was not going to let it go...How much? How much? It's their loan, I can tell them...HOW MUCh???

I told her I was getting $50. Keep in mind these are very small people of a descent I cannot recognize. Perhaps Guatamalan descent. You must understand how small they are to see this from my perspective.

Her tiny little husband was quietly holding a tiny little chihuahua kind of off to the side.

When he heard my answer "$50.00" he started LAUGHING and that dog of his started barking and barking. "That's ALL?" GUFFAWS.

The wife said, "but that is not that BAD...it is only for around an hour and to two hours of YOUR time, and you get mileage for your car on top of that, right?"

No.

She said, "Well, then you are not really making more than minimum wage. You need to charge more. "

[Did not send [this] part to SS: And, while I nearly bit my tongue off, I thought...I would really like to liberate your husband and the chihuahua and get them out of this HExx hole and away from you, you tiny wretched little control freak.]

My reply:

"Yes," I said sweetly, "but this was a Navy Federal."

PROBLEM #5
The husband doubles over...kept laughing! Slapping his leg!

She wanted my business card so she could refer me to people who might need a notary...I told her it was cheaper to go to UPS for a little document here and there.

Bull, I thought. Translated this means: So I could receive her call in two months demanding that I train her... so I can kill my my own livelihood. But, I did not have a card with me, thank goodness.

Something tells me, however, it is not over. I have a sick feeling she has put my phone number into their speed dial.

I am pretty sure that I lost a pretty fair foothold in my little piece of Texas to a woman at a $50 appointment.

Can you believe that the husband literally slapped his leg and LAUGHED at me FOR TAKING THAT AMOUNT! And, the dog barked at him laughing at me so loud.


BUT, IT *WAS* A NAVY FEDERAL!


----All in good fun!----

Reply by Sandi on 8/4/05 7:39pm
Msg #57028

ROFLMAO ... *sigh*

I am soooo surprised to hear that Brenda_TX took a $50 ... but, it *WAS* a Navy Federal!

May your days get better ... (they CAN'T get worse)!

Ms. Hyper with sunglasses in hand!

Reply by Teasa/NY on 8/4/05 7:43pm
Msg #57030

You should have been an algebra teacher instead. But no ..........

Reply by Sylvia_FL on 8/4/05 7:45pm
Msg #57032

Oh gosh, Brenda, I have done lots of those Navy Federal ones for $50 - they are always close to home and I am in and out in about 20 minutes. Never gone through what you went through. I do them direct through Navy Federal too and they won't budge over $50 for those, unless you go out of your base area.

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 8:40pm
Msg #57042

I'll spin this one a bit...

The way I see the money is we must work it so that we personally profit.

We have to charge enough on a regular basis to cover our expenses, or we will not stay in business. It's just not going to work if you never think through what a signing actually costs.

If you already have something that day on your calendar, a $50 signing is not losing you money. I can make money on two $50 signings in a day, but if I had one $50 signing per day, I would not make enough to go across town once each day.

Once you have another signing in a day, you are already out, the car is rolling, the wrap on the new $5.99 pair of pantyhose is already broken and you won't toss them even if you run them before the second signing. They will make it through two. The $1.99 of fingernail polish, lipstick, mascara, and hairspray is spent anyhow...you are wearing your $8.99 dry cleaned clothes from the cleaners for multiple signings that day rather than just one for $50... so if there is a spill it's for more than just that $50.

So, as you can see, on a signing appointment I calculate the amount "at risk" from
of getting dressed for the job to be as great as $16. So, that leaves $34.

I said, "at risk" because I may be able to get more than one wearing out of my hose, and I might be able to wear my dry cleaned clothes four or five times...but not usually in the summer.


I am going to drive as many as 40 miles and I figure that at the state's reimbursement rate of approximately $.35 ea = $14.00, so that leaves $20.00. (Again, this is variable. I am using worst case figures.)


So, I have $20 left. What about insurance? What about memberships, etc.?

I have to print the confirmation (6 pages = a few cents), I have to print a map = one cent, I have to consider the actual expense of phone minutes and even the stamp ink, the pen ink usage, my efax cost of the fax in, and the faxing back and I use efax because many times $50 companies don't pay on time and you have got to keep up with your faxes for months, if not forever. Actually, I should now figure depreciation on my equipment, the cost of cable, my electricity, etc. and I think that will bring me to about $17.00.

Now, I realize some do not agree with all these petty expenses, but I do believe this reflects the truth of what we are making when we do the job. At the end of a $50 appointment, I have actually made about $7.00 - $10.00 per hour for a total of $14-$20 IF we are lucky. I cannot survive on making a net of $20 per signing.

But, if that $20 is on top of another...maybe.

Reply by Brenda Stone on 8/4/05 8:42pm
Msg #57043

Sylvia...this was just a general answer about my

philosophy on our costs and fees.

I understand about the easy package...it was just that WOMAN. DEVIL WOMAN.

Reply by Sylvia_FL on 8/4/05 9:11pm
Msg #57047

I can usually fit those Navy Federal in with other appointments.
I wish my panythose were only $5.99 - LOL
I dryclean my own clothes in the dryer with those Closet Secret (I think that is the brand). They are great!
I wouldn't drive 40 miles to do one of these signings though. I only do them in "my own backyard". And they do pay fast, and no faxbacks - just close the signing out on their website.

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 9:40pm
Msg #57051

Sylvia, We have a vastly different frame of reference to speak from. In Texas, I have never had a set of docs on a property which was not at least 55 pages.

Those are the Chase HELOCs and those are a PITA in their own right because of the way they must be handled, so $50 is way low for these...today was the first NF I have handled.

I am very careful about taking on anyone at face value for $50. I will quote high, then come down. I have been very mad at myself for taking $50 jobs that turned into a royal pita and knocked me out of good jobs, but I have never been mad at myself for not taking a signing that was $50 when I realized how difficult those who want to pay $50 in Texas turn out to be. Someone said bottom feeder. That's correct a lot of the time.

Reply by Dorothy/MI on 8/5/05 7:19am
Msg #57092

Clarification

Brenda, I thought that all HELOC's in TX had to be done by an attorney. Did something change? Sure hope so for all your sakes.

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/5/05 8:22am
Msg #57101

Re: Clarification

Nope, nothing changed. I should have emphasized that the HELOC was on a CA property. I know...I was at their *Home* and that would seem to be the property the HELOC was on.

That was a part of the original discussion with the SS that they did not get posted. When I got the call from the SS with assurance of how small the package was, I paused her to ask her if she knew about the HELOC situation in Texas and that she should be sure to check it out as far as where the property was located.

I can sign a HELOC on a CA property at a home...just not a Texas property.

Interestingly enough, this was a good SS and the owner called me back to ask me *WHAT?*

I sent them a copy of my

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/5/05 8:24am
Msg #57102

Re: Clarification--oops, posted too quick...

Sent them a copy of the section in the Tx Const that specifies this info.

Reply by Merry_CA on 8/5/05 3:41pm
Msg #57203

Loved your story Brenda!... But REALLY liked your breakdown of the actual COSTS involved in performing a signing. So many times I've heard people on this board say things like " I had two $50 signings today I just made $100." NO!... you didn't PROFIT $100. All the gas, insurance, printer paper, toner, phone, fax, cable or DSL, pantyhose (ugh!), nail polish, child care, etc, etc. must be DEDUCTED before you can talk about your PROFIT!

Reply by Becca/FL on 8/4/05 9:32pm
Msg #57050

I get a whopping $65 for NFCU's in my area. I don't do too many so when the TC that was sending them my way added fax backs I said thanks but, no thanks. It just was not worth it, even though it was just a NFCU. Oh, and I had to wait 45-60 days to get paid.

I will do WaMu HELOCS in my county for $50. Nice, easy and pay like clockwork.

My dear Brenda - I feel your pain. BTW, do women in Texas really wear pantyhose in the summertime? When I first moved to Florida I was selling advertising for a Radio group. One day the Station Manager called me into his office to tell me I was too overdressed for our market and I needed to loose the nylons and the suits. I havn't wore nylons since! Thanks to my boyfriend, I sport nicely tanned legs and I have a pedicure every three weeks. I look at it this way, If Katie Couric can do it so can I.

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 9:54pm
Msg #57053

**BTW, do women in Texas really wear pantyhose in the summertime?**

"Becca," said BrendaTx in a tiny little voice which was clearly not the tone of gentile Southern modesty it was masquerading to be, "This one does wear pantyhose a good deal of the time. I have to be careful about baring my legs whether tanned or not. It's just not fair to everyone else who isn't me."

Reply by Becca/Fl on 8/4/05 10:27pm
Msg #57062

You are a beautiful woman! Don't be silly.

I do have one more question for you, though. Do you save the hat and gloves for signings that pay $100 or $150?

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/5/05 1:10am
Msg #57077

**You are a beautiful woman! Don't be silly.**

Heh heh...re-read my post. I was doing a "Blanche Devereaux"

As far as the hat and gloves... I think a little white pillbox hat and white gloves go rather nicely with a navy blue suit.

Those were before my time, but I do think they are pretty cute






on

CROSS-DRESSERS

AND

GREAT-GRANDMOTHERS,

BECCA!

Reply by missy_socal on 8/4/05 10:13pm
Msg #57057

I work directly for Navy Federal occasionally, and they won't budge from their $50 overnight fee for me.
However, since they've almost all been edocs, that's $75 for a very small package....20 minutes in and out for the most part. As Sylvia says, though (and she's the reason that I even signed up with NFCU!) "Only in my backyard!" :-)

Reply by missy_socal on 8/4/05 10:15pm
Msg #57058

ps.--Becca

Becca says, "Thanks to my boyfriend, I sport nicely tanned legs..."

I just have to know: How does your boyfriend tan your legs??

Reply by Becca/FL on 8/4/05 10:23pm
Msg #57060

Re: ps.--Becca

He has a beautiful Catalina 310 (31 foot sail boat) and is retired so we get away quite a bit. I'm taking off tomorrow after three morning appointments for a mini vacation on the water.

Reply by Teresa Welter CA on 8/4/05 7:46pm
Msg #57033

Brenda that was extremely funny!
I don't mean what happen to you but the way you wrote it. Thank you for sharing. I always look forward to reading your posts!

Reply by LilyMD on 8/4/05 8:04pm
Msg #57037

That was a great laugh! Brenda, thanks for a fun end to a long day.

Reply by AngelinaAZ on 8/4/05 8:06pm
Msg #57038

OMG Brenda... can you imagine

Can you imagine if she did get her commission? The saving grace on that one would be that she *control freak* would probably not let anybody ELSE's docs out of her hands long enough to be looked at or signed... Can you imagine HER sitting in front of borrowers?

"no no... you can't hold it... you might wrinkle it, or get it dirty, or get it out of order.... just sign here and don't touch anything else!!!!"

Just look at it this way... "It's what you did for your country!!!"

..... and I can almost GUARANTEE you are right about the speed-dial... uh oh!

Reply by Paul2_FL on 8/4/05 8:18pm
Msg #57040

Re: OMG Brenda... can you imagine

Brenda, are you sure the dog was barking and not laughing too?

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 8:46pm
Msg #57046

Re: OMG Brenda... can you imagine

I think the dog was barking because he never heard the man laugh so much before. Seriously.

Reply by CA_Jeanet on 8/4/05 10:39pm
Msg #57064

Re: OMG Brenda... can you imagine

Brenda, I applaud you! I think you missed your calling. Were you ever in the military? Seriously, I must tell you about the dress codes in northern CA. I'm originally from the bay area, and everyone in business dresses there. I've been instructed that I must do that here as well. O.K., I went to one of my first signings dressed "casual" for bay area standards. Problem arose, and had to return the same evening to Mr. and Mrs. Borrower. When I had returned in my jeans and sweater (it was raining), she stated, "Oh, I said to myself, I hope she doesn't dress up again". I was shocked as she had been intimidated by my appearance, and as a result have found a happy medium for my area. Hose are now a Sunday affair. Phew!
I really appreciate everything you post. I don't miss any of them, because they are informative and sometimes stress busters! You go girl.

Reply by TitleGalCA on 8/4/05 11:12pm
Msg #57068

See Brenda? This is as good as...

Ice cream!

Great post - funny and entertaining. We've missed you!

I sorta think there's a different spin on this - I think you saved the world from the Devil Lady NSA - her laughing husband will make sure of that. Thanks!

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/5/05 1:23am
Msg #57078

Re: OMG Brenda... can you imagine

Thank you Jeanet.

I really dress the way I do to go sign because I am not one of those people who can do business casual very well. If I try to go business casual, I look dowdy - even when I was 18 I looked dowdy in casual slacks.

Now, I once wore a pair of workboots, blue jeans and a man's yellow slicker to get through the torrential rain we were having. It was a good choice and I did *not* look dowdy, just very much like the people on the farm where I was were dressed.

It's vanity...if I looked good in a more casual style, make no mistake, I'd be wearing it.

Reply by BrendaTX on 8/4/05 8:45pm
Msg #57045

Re: OMG Brenda... can you imagine

"no no... you can't hold it... you might wrinkle it, or get it dirty, or get it out of order.... just sign here and don't touch anything else!!!!"

That's really what I am talking about.

She'll get her commission. And, she will be the very best notary in the entire world. BTW, she transcribes 8 hrs a day - working at home - on medical transcription tapes . . . did not volunteer to cut me in on THAT deal.

Reply by DM/CA on 8/5/05 4:02am
Msg #57080

Oooh Brenda -- what a nightmare! Every once in a while I will take on one that I just KNOW I shouldn't and it's never worth it. The laughing husband and barking Chihuahua take the cake though.

The next time I'm dealing with difficult client I will think of you and that absurd trio-- the tiny woman wrestling you for the docs, the tiny husband falling off his chair laughing at your tiny fee, and the tiny dog barking to beat the band!

Thanks for the reminder and the laugh!

Reply by newlysmomva on 8/5/05 8:08am
Msg #57096

Thanks for the laugh. It will help my Friday go better! I feel for ya!

Reply by Teasa/NY on 8/5/05 8:14am
Msg #57098

I'm sure we all did someting before we did this job; corporate, teaching, daycare, whatever. I think if the non-signing agent public ever read this board they would think we were "tetched" in the head for doing this job. Brenda you handeled it like a pro. Can you picture a poor newbie in this situation. Head for the hills.

Reply by Dogmonger, Ca on 8/5/05 9:22am
Msg #57117

Brenda I am sure you missed your calling

You should have been a writer. I REALLY enjoyed the story and PLEASE keep it up. Perhaps you and Hugh could team up for some romance novels:-) Or maybe Bass Boat Quaterly:-o

Reply by Monica-FL on 8/5/05 10:04am
Msg #57123

LMAO - Oh my God, Brenda, You are awesome! What a story - really made my day. Keep 'em coming!!!!

Reply by Giselle_CA on 8/5/05 10:42am
Msg #57127

What a story. You made my day! Thanks for the fun...

Reply by WF-CA on 8/5/05 10:49am
Msg #57130

Brenda--that is (sorry) the funniest story I have read to date! I could picture the whole sad thing with your great storytelling!! Thanks for sharing & starting the weekend off on a funny note.
Wendy

Reply by Charm_AL on 8/5/05 11:20am
Msg #57135

what an experience! I hope she doesn't pursue the idea of becoming a notary. I believe if she does become a NSA, she won't last long.