Posted by BrendaTX on 6/15/05 11:10pm
Msg #45012

People who post "anonymously" - a Small Rant

People who post "anonymously" sre annoying as he** when trying to follow a thread.

I don't care if you are a chicken...just be a chicken with identity. Distinguish yourself.

Cluck, cluck.

Reply by anonymous on 6/16/05 12:07am
Msg #45023

For what purpose, to be bashed and trashed. One is not interested in seeing their name placed on the very message boards signing services my or may not view, while be accused of posting messages they never even posted. So by coming forward and revealing one's name, certainly with the bashing that goes on here one is indeed forced to at least attempt to hide their identity. Besides what do you care who is who and long as you yadda yadda yadda in your usual tone. Deal with it TEX.

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 10:09pm
Msg #45386

>>>>Deal with it TEX.<<<<

Okay, anonymous, TEX will deal.

AnonymousTx

Reply by Melody on 6/16/05 12:12am
Msg #45025

I agree with Brenda.

Do not use the name "Anonomous" or "Anon". Pick something else.

Many of us scan posts by certain people because we have come to respect their contributions.

Call yourself "Esmeralda de las Zapatas."

We don't care.

Just pick a persona and stick with her.

Reply by anonymous on 6/16/05 12:19am
Msg #45027

No thanks, posted with my name in the past, never again. May I suggest you simply ignore all anonymous posts, what's the difference if one uses anonymous or Esmeralda, same difference. Don't read all anonymous or Esmeralda, this will be the clue for you not read. Excellent, then know you respect no one who posts anonymously so skim over them, EASY.

Reply by Ernest_CT on 6/16/05 12:26am
Msg #45030

Hmmm. Anyone want to guess this poster's real id? n/m

Reply by Ernest_CT on 6/16/05 12:23am
Msg #45028

Right on!

99.9% of the time we don't really care who the poster is, we just want to be able to associate a nom de forum with an identity. It really does help us! Most people who read the posts get to know whose answers are reliable, who rants, and who needs to get a life.

If you've done something that is questionable, and don't want to admit it, then choose an "Author" name such as "oops!" or "Did I mess up?" and people will understand why you want to remain anonymous. Using "Anonymous" just to talk trash or bash another poster is childish.

Reply by Sunny on 6/16/05 12:52am
Msg #45035

Re: Right on!

Peolpe post anonymously because they have been trashed by ones who use their own names. Maybe this should be directed at the ones trashing.

Reply by AngelinaAZ on 6/16/05 1:52am
Msg #45045

Re: Right on!

Personally I think Anonymous posters are gutless! As for not reading anonymous posts, I'm like a looky-loo at the scene of an accident, I have to open everything once I start reading a thread.

The request was essentially... if you don't want to give your name... then don't. Just name yourself something so we can tell one poster from the next.

Reply by Sunny on 6/16/05 2:26am
Msg #45050

Unprofessional

If people didn't feel the need to trash, quite possibly no one would post anonymously. What is wrong with being civil! I bet none of you would trash a borrower, for what you felt was a stupid question. Yet you will your peers. Looks great for the signing companies and the title companies that read these boards. Looks real professional.

Reply by BrendaTx on 6/16/05 6:03am
Msg #45059

It's still the same...

I don't like it when people use the word "Anonymous" as their handle in a thread.

Sunny is not the "Anonymous" handle...it just makes it easier to follow your posts...heh heh...when you bash me.

It is also very annoying when people use the author box to comment.

Comprehensive reading is all that I care about.

Sunny is correct about SS/TCs reading this. I have received more than one call from employers as a result of posting here. My willingness to learn my craft and run a business is shown by the post frequently referred to here as #33325.

If I were going to employ a new person here, Sam would be my first choice...Merry, next, right off the top of my head. Both show a clear ability to think, reason, learn and give the bwr a feeling of confidence about their loan docs.

Reply by Sylvia_FL on 6/16/05 8:48am
Msg #45090

Re: It's still the same... - Brenda

I too have got work from title companies that have read my posts on the boards. I also got the position of a Certified Notary Instructor here in Florida as the people responsible for filling the position read the boards and liked my answers to questions, and thought I would make a good notary instructor. (You have to take a 3 hour class to become a notary in Florida)

So, companies do read the boards and you can get work from these companies.

Reply by Sunny on 6/16/05 10:02am
Msg #45116

My point exactly

My point exactly! You are very professional and have always been there willing to help going way back to the NASA board. Who better to teach a class than one that cares about their job and can get along with people. Why would they want to hire someone that will bash the students, the company would be reimbursing the students for the class because of the complaints. Same thing goes for dealing with borrowers.

Reply by Dogmonger, Ca on 6/16/05 9:06am
Msg #45094

What some people call trashing

is a nessecary culling process. This board is full of wonderful folks, and great information. But if the new folks truly wish to be in business for themselves, they must establish their independence to be a self starter, invest their own time in recovering information from the board. Otherwise we are doing no favors by handing out test answers, potential clients, ect. In doing so we are perpetuating a stream of unprepared notaries who will not even learn the laws of their state, NSA's who have no real working knowledge of documents solicting lenders and title companies. Basically lazy ill prepared people who have little or no business in being self employed. In my view, this is akin to welfare, a helping hand, not a handout. It may seem harsh to some who have never been self-employed, but all who should enter should remove the rose color glasses. Just my mean ole opinion:-)

Reply by BrendaTX on 6/16/05 9:41pm
Msg #45370

What some people call trashing/bashing...

Yeah, Dog...What some people call trashing/bashing are straight answers.

---------
The very best one piece of advice I have ever recieved on my business is:

::Never, ever show emotional reactions
::where your business is concerned.
::Be dignified and be sure of yourself.

Allowing perfect strangers hurt you with words on a notary forum you means you are not made for this job. You are going to be a pawn -- others control you because you let them.

If people who disagree with your opinions or methods cause you anger, ask yourself , "Why let other people's opinions have so much weight?" If you are right, you are right. Ignore them. Agree to disagree.

The world is full of jackasses - especially in our business...not JUST gripey old curmudgeon notaries, but downright pathological narcissistic evil people who will walk all over you to make a dollar. Know your stuff and be confident or you will be used up like toilet paper.

Get a tougher skin or you'll fold under pressure to do illegal notary acts. If you cannot take a truthful answer (or even a rude bashing) on this forum because it angers you...you are the "weakest link."

Whining and fussing about tones of posts by perfect strangers reveal that you cannot be graceful under pressure. This says you are going to get emotional if a bwr does. Indifferent rudeness -- even detached arrogance -- is a heck of a lot better at a table than emotional reaction. The so-called old mean bashers will just calmy state choices for the bwr, regain control of the signing and continue -- just like they continue to tell new notaries to do their homework, get prepared and stop crying.

However, if you *can* get a grip on your emotions *here* so much the better so that you can calmly say, "No can do." Otherwise, you are easily manipulated by both hiring entity and bwr. Practice covering up your buttons here, and you'll be amazed at how much more confidence and control you'll have in the field.

Those who continue to coddle you by saying "so sorry for these mean rude people...it's okay if you are ill-prepared for this job and have the emotions of a 3 yr old." are enablers. They want you to remain immature because they have their own little personal drama going on. They enjoy the role they play and even try to heighten it at times. Don't buy into all this stinking thinking--you are not a helpless victim.

Recommended reading:
Nasty People
Toxic People

Reply by Dorothy/MI on 6/16/05 9:57pm
Msg #45379

Great advice

Brenda, I've added this epistle to the thread 33325. (Hey, gal, want to write a book??) That thread is turning into a SA primer!!

Reply by CAtitlegal on 6/16/05 10:11pm
Msg #45387

Re: What some people call trashing/bashing...

***If you are right, you are right. Ignore them. Agree to disagree.***

Very, very good advice. Life is too short to let others rock your boat, and more important, as you said, if you react emotionally to posts on a board, just think how hard it will be maintaining control in a difficult signing with difficult borrowers. Knowing you are right, being confident of your own part of the overall transaction, allows you to do the job you were hired for - efficiently, professionally, and with minimal scarring.

I once worked with a lady at a title company, who held a reasonably high position in a male-dominated industry. She was very successful because not only did she do her job well, but she knew her part of the transaction was only one part of the whole. She was calm, confident, never cocky or had attitude, she just did her job with courtesy to all, even the most obnoxious of 'players'. Her motto was "everything is fixable". I loved that - because it's true. During a transaction, when others wigged out over small slights to their egos, or insignificant details, or impossible personalities, she maintained her own personal dignity. I've always tried to be like her - now...that's a true mentor!

Reply by ANON on 6/17/05 6:15pm
Msg #45665

Re: What some people call trashing/bashing...

Another useless post created by Brenda to market her self. Happens ones or twice a week, most comical.

Reply by BrendaTX on 6/17/05 11:03pm
Msg #45745

Re: What some people call trashing/bashing...

~~~Another useless post created by Brenda to market her self. Happens ones or twice a week, most comical.~~~

Nope...not marketing, worse than that. It was just me wasting space...rapping my head, blathering, opinionating, etc. And, as you say...it was basically a useless post.

However, I don't post this kind of useless commentary only once or twice a week...I post useless posts every time the whim hits me.

You can make snide comments about egotistical, rude Texans until the cows come home and it's going to affect me zero...You, however, are carrying the weight of a grudge against a total stranger who offended you with an opinion which differs from yours, I *guess* (?).

Just chalk it up to Texans' verbose stupidity and be indifferent to stupid Texas vermin...or keep being snide about Texans as much as possible...either way, the toxic results of this grudge is with you...not me.

More useless stuff, huh? Gosh...there is so much more where that came from...

Reply by Jon on 6/16/05 12:33pm
Msg #45191

Re: Unprofessional

I have NEVER bashed my peers............. I only bash those who are not my peers!!! Generally, as is evident by the questions posed, it is easy to determine those who are my peers and those who are not.

BTW, being a notary does NOT automatically make one my peer(or anyone else's for that matter).

Reply by Stephanie_CA on 6/16/05 2:39pm
Msg #45239

Re: Unprofessional-Great point Jon. n/m

Reply by Lava Girl aka Victoria/FL on 6/16/05 8:07am
Msg #45085

I'm going to start using "Lava Girl" n/m

Reply by Cris_AR on 6/16/05 5:42am
Msg #45058

I cannot even imagine being concerned with something like this. After reading this board for a few months I have noticed alot of rudeness, alot of reading between the lines etc etc. I have been self-employed for 12 years, I do not "jump" people who ask questions relating to my profession, if I do not want to answer a question I do not, it is that simple. Mama always says if you cannot say somehing nice do not say anything at all. I just do not have the time or energy to be mean and act ugly towards people on a message board who ask a question regardless of what I think about the question.

Reply by BrendaTx on 6/16/05 6:14am
Msg #45060

Re: People who post

***I cannot even imagine being concerned with something like this.*** (Waaaahhhh...Cris is being mean to me.)

****Mama always says if you cannot say somehing nice do not say anything at all. ****
And, my mama is still using cliches that does not have anything to do with using a forum as a networking and learning tool. (Stop being mean to me by using your Mama as a weapon!)

****I just do not have the time or energy to be mean and act ugly towards people on a message board who ask a question regardless of what I think about the question. **** (Waaaahhhh...Cris is saying I am using my energy to be mean and act ugly towards people.)

That was humor. I could care less.

Cris...be careful, by posting something as non-mean as this, you will be taken as a rude person. See, I am just kidding about the Waaaaahhhh...but this is the kind of thing that could be construed as a bash against me if I were so thin-skinned. Apparently, you were concerned enough to post to let me know you don't agree. That's what a forum is about. But, sometimes simply not agreeing can turn into a mudslinging.

I don't care if you call yourself Santa Claus...just as long as you are not one of three Anons in a thread. Comprehensive reading is all I care about.

Get your hackles down "Legion of Anons." Last time I checked...the USA still allows people to have opinions and I have one. You have the right to post with the name Anonymous...it's my right to be annoyed by it.

That's my story and I am sticking to it.

Reply by BrendaTx on 6/16/05 6:15am
Msg #45061

Re: People who post - PS a Query....

**Get your hackles down "Legion of Anons." ***

Does anyone know: What's a hackle??

Reply by Victoria/FL on 6/16/05 8:06am
Msg #45083

Re: People who post - PS a Query....

(Pronunciation Key)hack·le1 Listen: [ hkl ]
noun

Any of the long, slender, often glossy feathers on the neck of a bird, especially a male domestic fowl.

hackles The erectile hairs along the back of the neck of an animal, especially of a dog.

a. A tuft of cock feathers trimming an artificial fishing fly. b. A hackle fly.
tr.v. hack·led, hack·ling, hack·les

To trim (an artificial fishing fly) with a hackle.

Idiom:
get (one's) hackles up
To be extremely insulted or irritated.

Reply by BrendaTX on 6/16/05 7:28pm
Msg #45335

Thank you Lady Lava - re Hackles n/m

Reply by Cris_AR on 6/16/05 7:32am
Msg #45079

Re: People who post

(Waaaahhhh...Cris is saying I am using my energy to be mean and act ugly towards people.)



I guess you are entitled to think whatever but I did not say that , you did.
Not going to waste anymore time on this subject.

Reply by Midwest on 6/16/05 8:54am
Msg #45091

To Brenda: in defense - People who post "anonymously" -

To Brenda, in defense of using ANON as a handle. I don't consider myself a chicken but i prefer to remain anonymous on this board because I have been threatened by someone that lives within a 20 mile radius of me. This person has a public email address and is a friend of a friend so I emailed them a question once. It was very vague and non threataning. I received back a 2 page email from this person threating to put me, the newbie, out of business, report me to ss/tc. It scared the pants off of me, i had only been at this for a few months at the time. My reputation is golden and i should not worry about them putting me out of business. I am sucessfull but I just don't want people like that knowing my business or opinion. As a sidebar -Brenda - to everyone that is looking for a mentor - just read Brendas posts. You have taught us all more than you will ever know, thank you.

Reply by BrendaTX on 6/16/05 8:49pm
Msg #45354

Re: To Brenda: in defense - back atcha Midwest...

You are using "Midwest" and that's not using the ANONYMOUS handle.

People would get so much more from this forum if they branded themselves when they are new especially...you know...just so they can be distinguished from others - and hang that State abbrv on it, too. (Right Ernest-CT?)

Also...people who REALLY want to be Anons for safety purposes should register a free profile, then create a handle which could be like: NotaryX - UT. That way they get the best help plus hide their location if they have an IP which is not used by the masses.

Log in to protect your anon status, folks.

If you don't log in and you have an IP that is not like AOL or Netscape, you are not always so anonymous.

For instance, if I don't log in you can see my IP and it will tell you that I am in College Station, Texas using Cox Cable access.

Just please consider using a handle!

An anonymous handle that distinguishes one form others is great. I joked about the chicken thing....PinkyTx, RogerRabbit-IN...anything like would be a good ones...ANYTHING but yet another Anonymous.

And, as far as my posts being educational, I have only taught what I too was learning these last 18 months. I try to be helpful by putting a link to my "path" in my profile for new people.

Before I posted the first time, I lurked and read EVERYTHING that was posted.

I learn a tremendous amount from the NEW PEOPLE who post great questions about things I have never seen! If I don't answer it's probably for one of two reasons...either I don't know the answer, or it was posted with the Anonymous handle in a thread with other Anons. Zoom past 'em. Too confusing.

But, sometimes the new folks ask questions and the REAL Originals like sue, Paul, Sylvia, Bobbi, Roger, Jon, Janet et al post the answers. I LEARN.

When I got into this business, I had already made a decision to be "out there." I decided to use every available place to give myself links to contact info. And, if you do that, you cannot be Anon. I'll just have to take my chances, because unlike you Midwest...I am still struggling to find the level of success I desire. I get weird stuff too. It's the modern version of obscene phone calls.

Thank you so much for the kind words.

BrendaTx

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:30am
Msg #45101

Ok - here is an idea

For a full week, I suggest we all post with the name "anonymous" and see how confusing it gets!

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 11:20am
Msg #45140

Yep, could get real interestin' and sooooo confussion two.

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 12:02pm
Msg #45174

Ultimately the folks that hire us, will defiantly sidestep the ones that bash. The inability to be pleasant regardless of who asks or what the question, is defiantly not a good trait for someone that has to meet with borrowers and be pleasant regardless of the circumstance.
They are looking for someone that has good manners at all times, and its not hard to figure out who has and who dose not from reading the posts on here. Perhaps if the bashers with the bad attitude posted anonymously they would not be pegged as undesirable character's with minds so small that it only holds them selfs and what goes on in their little life's as important.
Anonymous postings sure do confuse as often is looks like one is talking to one self.

Reply by AngelinaAZ on 6/16/05 1:09pm
Msg #45211

WOW I guess I'm probably not going to get ANY calls from SS's based on my posts! I am not a basher but I am not Miss Manners either!

I do my job extremely well, I am a professional at all times in the field and on the phone with colleages. (Yes I keep my outrageous personality in check) But to be honest, sometimes I think this industry can be a little stuffy! And I have had many a day when I come home feeling like I give give give... and they take take take. I am WAY nicer to all industry people than they generally are to me. Once relationships are established this changes but on the whole... I think they don't treat us with a whole lot of respect right off the bat. I EARN the respect I get and yet I just GIVE it to them.

So, when I come here, I have taken off my suit, let my hair down, kicked off the heels and I am just me. I thought that's what this forum was for. I guess I was mistaken!

*** Please use this forum to discuss notarial procedures, share experiences, ask questions of your peers, etc. *** (Since when are the SS's our peers, seems to me the ones that just come to lurk shouldn't be here... it's kind of like listening to your kid's phone calls... and it is ONE SIDED. If we could watch them behind the scenes or open up the forum so we could hear them talk TO EACH OTHER about the details of what and how they do what they do, and which ones think we deserve only $46 per signing, or trip fees for a no-sign and WHY, then maybe I wouldn't feel this way... I have a great deal of respect for Sylvia because when she comes here she talks as a Notary not an SS and when talking as an SS on the Notary Board she gives us inside information on her dealings... so to speak.)

AND *** Please avoid the advertising of your services *** I thought that that applied to us as well which is why I have just been me and haven't used everything I post to be a walking advertisement. (Brenda is great because her experience is evident, she is inspirational, but she isn't faky faky either.)

Obviously I missed a really big marketing tool! I think I'm going to think up an alias...link it to my profile and come back with really good, and really sweet advice all the time.

Goodbye AngelinaAZ!!!!!

Reply by Sam on 6/16/05 1:14pm
Msg #45216

**when I come here, I have taken off my suit, let my hair down, kicked off the heels and I am just me**

which is why we all like hearing from you!!!

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 4:31pm
Msg #45269

OK are you the same anonymous as the first anonymous, or are you the same as the second one, or are you a completely different anonymous - or are you me???

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:16pm
Msg #45363

If I'm you and you are me, who are they?

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 6:31pm
Msg #45311

What do you mean bash?

Reply by ERNA_CA on 6/16/05 6:46pm
Msg #45314

Maybe they are having a bash for all the anons. It they are serving food and drink. I will conceder becoming an anon.....lol

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 7:02pm
Msg #45320

Well, grab yourself a drink Erna and join us

Lots of anonymouses - or should that be anonymice? are here, so just pull up a chair and blend in.

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:12pm
Msg #45362

"Ultimately the folks that hire us, will defiantly sidestep the ones that bash. The inability to be pleasant regardless of who asks or what the question, is defiantly not a good trait for someone that has to meet with borrowers and be pleasant regardless of the circumstance. "

Bashing is in the eye of the bashee. SS's, title and loan companies don't bypass bashors because of their unpleasantness in a reply. Instead, it is obvious to them who knows their stuff and who doesn't. If anyone gets bypassed, it is the ones who refuse to find their own answers first and then ask if they have had no luck on their own. It has been pointed out several times that what people consider insulting and rudeness here, is only directed at the people too lazy to research on their own. Borrowers are treated with the utmost professionalism.

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:03pm
Msg #45359

Sounds good to me. We can be mean, we can be rude, we can be helpful. We can be new, we can be old. We can give correct advice and we can give incorrect advice. But we will all be ANONYMOUS

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:43pm
Msg #45371

This is going to be fun.

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 9:52pm
Msg #45376

Are you being mean to me?

Reply by Anonymous on 6/16/05 11:22pm
Msg #45406

No not being mean to you, I was being mean to anonymous.

But you are anonymous,and so am I.
So, maybe you are being mean to me!