Posted by Anonymous on 9/28/05 10:18am
Msg #67763

Mentoring...do's and don'ts

I'm a newbie but intense about integrity and honesty and the oath that I took means something to me. I studied and became certified, read every forum I could find for months, purchased everything recommended to me to be successful, bought CD's...you name it I did it. It was recommended to get a mentor, I contacted one on the list, was accepted and met her for lunch. Paid her cash money (more than a closing would pay) and thought I was well on my way of gaining knowledge and learning through OTJ training. WRONG!

After 4 weeks of phone tag and e-mail hello's I took the reins, sent out a ton of letters of introduction and filled out every application I could get my hands on. Poof! A notary replied to me just to let me know she wasn't a signing company but wanted to wish me good luck. A wonderful, intelligent lady with integrity and professionalism, a lady that showed me more in 3 e-mails than what I learned in a month. A lady that wasn't worried about me taking her business, an OUTSTANDING example of why I actually joined this fraternity...if you're reading this...I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

DON'T mentor if you have no intention of following through.
DON'T mentor if you don't know the laws of your State, false knowledge prepetuates itself.
DON'T mentor if you're insecure about your own skills.
DON'T mentor anyone within your own territory.
DON'T mentor if it's "just about the money".

DO mentor if you're know what you're talking about and WANT to make this industry better.
DO mentor if you're secure with your customers and not afraid for your territory.
DO mentor if it's something you enjoy rather than a quick way to make a few bucks.
DO mentor if you have positive attitudes to pass on within this field.

Sorry but I had to vent. Perhaps you'll understand why with the following paragraph:

When you work hard to do everything right, when you finally get a signing and your "mentor" informs you it's not a "good signing", that "they know you're new and the SS is trying to put something over on you", that "I wouldn't do that signing if I were you, you're gonna be sorry" AND THEN you follow the advice because you truly care about people and the oath that you've taken.......when your "mentor" takes the signing and then proceeds to do a 180 and say what a "typical" signing it was and how smoothly it went....ya gotta wonder why you spent your money.

ALL of the lessons I have learned within the forum community never dealt with mentoring, never warned us newbies about throwing our money into a rat hole. More than anything else I didn't want to be the type of notary that you all write about, the one that totally screwed up the signing that you had to re-do. I wanted to be proud of my work and wanted others to know that I had a good WORKING knowledge...I was afraid to go out on my own without the BASICS.

Now I'm not sure which direction I'll go in...this left a really nasty taste in my mouth. I need to take a deep breath and fall back, regroup. I guess we all can be used but quite frankly I hadn't expected it BEFORE I ever dealt with a SS. Newbies beware...don't be afraid to speak up when someone tries to tell you something that you KNOW goes against your state laws. That person isn't there to teach you the right way, that person is there to take what you've got!

Whew...sorry again...BUT I FEEL BETTER!

Reply by Anonymous on 9/28/05 10:56am
Msg #67773

if your dishardened now....

Just a word of experience, please consider that that one notary does not make all notaries! As in any business there are those who make us all cringe!

More important for you personally, is that if you feel you have been taken by a simple person, and you cant continue with this business, then maybe you should reconsider being in business for yourself. Not trying to be hurtful, just stating the obvious (sorry crappy spelling!).

There are MANY signing services that will make you wiggle squirm and down right cry! they promise you everything, tell you its ok to backdate/postdate/dont even bother dating! lol whatever they can get away with, withhold your pay for three months or better and/or NEVER PAY YOU A CENT!

This is a rough business, but if you thrive on working for yourself and you can survive the SLOW periods (financially) you LIKE TRAVEL, and you LIKE People! then you just need to get a thicker skinn and learn from those bad experiences that you encounter.

I do welcome you to the business, and I wish you the best of luck. I dont think you need a mentor (who knows maybe I could do more?) but if you hang out on the boards here you can get all your mentoring you need for FREE!!

Best regards,

A half new have used notary

Reply by Anonymous on 9/28/05 11:13am
Msg #67784

Re: if your dishardened now....

I thank you for your reply. Ya know, I have been in business and been successful a few times in my long years. I brokered freight and owned a couple of units myself. I know exactly what it takes to survive in the lean times and how to hustle in the rough moments. What I have to UNLEARN is trust...a valuable and fleeting commodity in this day and age. I truly believe in the "golden rule" and won't get down on a snakes level regardless of the situation, two wrongs definitely will never make a right. In other words, I won't pass what I've recently "learned" onto another person just to "get even". My fault, expensive lesson well learned. HOWEVER, folks like this should never NEVER be recommended on sites, this to me makes that site just as low as the person they recommend.

My mentor is worried about me taking business from her, obviously. Well now she has reason to worry because I will do just that by reputation and integrity alone. It may take me a lifetime but I WILL BE SUCCESSFUL, failure is not an option. I never cut a throat in the trucking industry which is notorious for back stabbing and I'll not get down in the dirt in this one either. In the end we all have to look at our own faces in the morning when we face a new day. I'm just ticked off that I was stupid....there....I said it....UGH!

Reply by Anonymous on 9/28/05 11:19am
Msg #67789

you sound like the rest of us now :) (normal not!)

if there is anything you want to talk about or need any help just let us know. most of us here will help you out and we watch others for bad/false information. some real heated discussions sometimes BUT they are good because you see both sides of any story here!

Now stop kicken' yourself and smile. there are some folks on your side.

I am M.A.Brescia and I am listed here. I believe my web page is listed here and my email. If you need anything just hollar! i will try my best. and if i dont know i will tell you that too ... and best of all I will do that for free

Reply by Anna Nikander on 9/28/05 11:35am
Msg #67792

It sounds like you've really done your homework and you don't need a mentor. I'm certain you WILL succeed. The tone of your post sounds determined and that is to be admired. I am doing the same thing you are: reading the message boards, studying every signing agent guide I can get my hands on, learning my notary laws inside out, and learning ALL aspects of this business.

I understand that you feel wounded by this unscrupulous notary. But don't let this one unfortunate experience ruin your faith in the rest of humanity. I firmly believe people are fundamentally good and I approach every new person with that mindset. People will rise or sink to your level of expectation. There will always be bad or misguided people in the world, lacking integrity, lacking honesty, fearful that you or someone else will take something from them. But if you treat people with distrust, then you pass up the opportunity to deal with people under the best of circumstances rather than the worst.

Listen to your instincts, they will guide you. It's when I've ignored my instincts that I've had problems with situations and people. And approach people with a blank slate. Give them the benefit of the doubt until they do something to merit your suspicions. Trust must be continually earned, it's not a given, not even with family members. But mistrust shouldn't be a given either when a person has done nothing to warrant it.

I wish you the best of luck in this business.

-AnnaCA