Posted by Hugh Nations Signing Agents of Austin on 8/4/06 2:34pm
Msg #137131
The following is from the NY Times
Years ago, during the Viet Nam war, it was my job as a feature writer for the Houston Post to personalize the obituaries of the soldiers from our circulation area who were victims of the war. In doing so, I rediscovered one of the first things a cub reporter learns: Everybody has a story. Often, in developing the obituary, it turned out to be front page caliber because of the extra attention we gave the development of those reports.
The following vignette of the return of a fallen marine is long, but it brought those stories back to mind. I found great poignancy in the deference shown by the fellow commuters toward the parents of the soldier. I think you will, too.
OP-ED CONTRIBUTOR
The Flags of Our Sons
By BILLY SHORE
Published: August 4, 2006
Washington
WHEN you fly as often as I do you learn to mind your own business as soon as you take your seat. But that wasn’t possible once I saw the military honor guard boarding US Airways’ 1:45 p.m. flight from Boston to Washington earlier this week.
I was heading through the gate when I first noticed Senator Ted Kennedy, walking down the concourse and arriving fashionably late, not an uncommon sight on this route. I stepped aside and followed him down the ramp.
As we got to the arched entrance of the plane, the members of a Marine honor guard in their dress blues were coming up that outside staircase usually used for stowing strollers and allowing mechanics on board. The marine in charge held in both hands a flag that had been folded into a triangle as if it had been previously draping a coffin, which it had.
Senator Kennedy extended his hand to the marine and said, “Thank you for your service.”
“Thank you, sir,” replied the marine.
“Are you escorting remains?” asked Senator Kennedy.
“Yes, sir, a marine.”
“And the funeral is at Arlington Cemetery?”
“Yes, sir, on Wednesday.”
“Thank you, I’ll try to get out there.”
The marine went back to sit in coach, but a man in the last row of the first-class cabin went over to him, shook hands and offered his seat. The marine reluctantly accepted. Half the passengers broke into applause.
The rest of the flight was uneventful, though quieter than usual. When we landed, the marine took his white gloves from where he’d stowed them inside his hat, put them on, and again gripped with both hands the precious cargo of the folded flag.
Then he went over to two people quietly sitting in first class — the parents of the fallen marine. None of us had known they were there.
He escorted them off the plane and into the terminal. Because of the afternoon’s oppressive heat and humidity, he had persuaded them to wait inside instead of on the tarmac.
The father looked as if he might have once been a marine himself, a handsome man of perfect posture, with bristly silver hair, dressed smartly in a blue blazer and gray slacks. The mother, blond, wore light-colored pants and an orange jacket. Her glasses made her eyes seem bigger than they were. They both looked calm, if a little lost, and gave off an aura of deep quiet. As she walked by me she noticed that a tie had fallen as I was removing something from my carry-on bag and she stopped and pointed. “I think you dropped something,” she said softly.
They stood at the window between Gates 43 and 45 and watched as a full Marine honor guard marched up the tarmac, coming to attention between the plane and a silver military hearse. The unloading of their son’s coffin from the cargo hold was very slow, and every time someone inside the terminal noticed and stopped to stare, someone else noticed and did the same, and this kept happening until about 20 people stood in silence watching out the window.
The mom leaned her elbows on the window ledge, supporting her chin and cheeks with both hands. She remained perfectly still. She stared for 10 or 15 long minutes and never moved. The father stood nearby, rocking from foot to foot and pacing a bit. They did not touch; they did not say a word to each other. Neither wore a wedding band. Perhaps they were divorced, or simply isolated in their pain.
Standing nearby was a man wearing the T-shirt of a suburban fire and rescue department that he may have earned 20 years and 35 pounds ago. He went over to the parents to chat, not knowing who they were, just one curious spectator to another.
But whatever he said to the mother caused her to turn and look at him in disbelief. Her lips didn’t move, which only encouraged him to repeat it. Her eyes widened and her chin tilted upward like a boxer who had taken a blow. She stared at him and then looked back outside toward her son. Down on the tarmac the white gloves of eight marines snapped their final salute as the doors of the hearse closed.
The P.A. system announced flights for Atlanta and Chicago. Travelers rushed to business meetings or summer vacations. The line for Auntie Anne’s pretzels was as long as ever.
Except for a handful of us standing frozen at a respectful distance from the window, the war and its carnage might as well have been on another planet. The disconnect between those who serve and those of us who are beneficiaries of their service has always felt great to me, but never greater than at that moment.
The mom and dad stepped away from the man in the T-shirt and to another window, still not touching, their movement synchronized by grief. They waited until the marine in charge came back up from the runway to escort them to a government vehicle. I went to my car and drove to work with no ambition for the day other than to be worthy.
Billy Shore is the founder of Share Our Strength, an antihunger organization.
| Reply by Merry_CA on 8/4/06 6:16pm
Msg #137179
Very beautiful Hugh. Thank you for posting this. It is important to reflect everyday on the needless loss of young life and the destruction of families at the hands of our "powers that be." These yound soldiers are very brave indeed... but what a price!... and for what?.... exactly what is it that they are dying for?.... I truly would like an answer to that question.... we are not fighting the ones who attacked us on 9/11/2001... so what is all the bloodshed for?... still trying to answer that one....
| Reply by Sher_AZ on 8/5/06 8:13am
Msg #137211
War has one purpose only. To reduce the population under the guise of justification. It saddens me to see so many of our children losing their lives under the pretext of war. You are right Merry, there doesn't seem to be a logical answer for this, does there? Not meant to be a political statement in any way because I fully support my brothers (all of which have served their country) but there just is too much bloodshed without cause.
| Reply by SarahBeth_CA on 8/5/06 9:35am
Msg #137215
Thank you for your service
Here we have a beautiful memorial for a selfless American who willingly chose to serve in the military knowing that he or she was putting themselves in harms way for freedom. It sickens me that in a time of memorial people can't just say "thank you for your service". It doesn't matter what the war is. What matters is a young American died for his country. I was really wondering what it was that the guy said to the mother of the soldier. I am glad I don't know but I really suspect it was probably the same crap I just read. There is a time where it is appropriate to speak out against the circumstances if you must. But when one is being prepared for burial or memorialized that is not the time. That is what the story was about. And yet they still didn't get it.
| Reply by TitleGalCA on 8/5/06 11:06am
Msg #137222
Re: Thank you for your service
It never, ever fails to amaze me that those that enjoy the country we have built (and protected) by the soldiers who have lost their lives, can become so superior and intellectual when it comes to the discussion of war, and the "unnecessary" loss of life.
"Thank you" and honoring those lives is the appropriate reponse.
| Reply by LkArrowhd/CA on 8/5/06 1:25pm
Msg #137255
Re: The following is from the NY Times-This article
certainly touches one. Being the mother of a child in the military, the sister to a brother who served this country, as well as a daughter of a father who served this country. I for one am fed up hearing about those that ask "why" "for what" shame on you. We need OUR military, we need A military...... how dare you basically spit on these young men and women who have chosen to protect the very blanket of freedom they provide "YES YOU" with.
I suggest you HUSH YOUR WORDS BEFORE A MILITARY PERSON HEARS YOU..........and say "Thank You" each and every person that serves this country past and present for the loss they have sacrificed for you and your families......
I admire these young men and women, who choose to serve........they stand tall and guard us all......Shame on your words..... they need our support now more the ever.......whatever your stance on the war may be.....did it ever occur to you they may have their thoughts about the war.....but they hitched up to serve our country no matter what......
| Reply by Sher_AZ on 8/5/06 2:52pm
Msg #137264
Re: The following is from the NY Times-This article
Gee, that will teach me to run an errand this morning! For all of you who thought my msg was inappropriate, it was NOT. I am speaking for a son who has served in the persian gulf war twice and voiced the very same words I put in print this morning. As it was explained to him, war has one purpose and I stated that purpose. Did ya'll also know that our future wars are supposed to be fought by "remote control combatants" only and there won't be any real soldiers? That's what our government told him when he was on his way to the Gulf the first time. I also have a brother who since being "lucky enough to come home from the Viet Nam war" wonders why he was ever put through that hxxxllll at the young age of 18 and where was the "appreciation" of the sacrifices he and so many others from this country showed when they came home?? Not that anyone ever spit on him, they just turned their backs and said welcome home, get over it! Unfortunately, it doesn't work out that way in real life.
Many of the Gulf war and Iraq war veteran's spend their time in and out of the psychic wards as a result of the horrors they live with every day. The guilt factor of why they survived and their comrades did not, is overwhelming and something they will never be able to get over. I DID NOT say anything derogatory towards the article from the NY Times nor our servicemen and women who so proudly serve this country. I also clarified that I was not trying to make a political statement, just saddened when I see the continuing loss of life in our children, family and friends in the name of what? For this to continue repesents a senseless act to me and SHAME on those of you who took it otherwise.
| Reply by SarahBeth_CA on 8/5/06 6:45pm
Msg #137281
Some people will never get it.
There's a time and a place for everything. Memorials and funerals are a time that if you don't have something nice to say then don't say anything at all. This was a memorial and you DID make a politcal statement. I am so glad that the shoe wasn't on your foot. I am so glad that your son made it through two tours in the Gulf. But think how you would have felt if he didn't and someone chose his memorial to make some nimrodic statement instead of just saying "thank you" in your time of mourning. Gheez.
| Reply by LkArrowhd/CA on 8/5/06 8:52pm
Msg #137289
Re: The following is from the NY Times-This article
Gee, that will teach me to run an errand this morning! For all of you who thought my msg was inappropriate, it was NOT.************ THERE WILL BE AN OPINION FOR THE WRITER AND THE READER.************* I am speaking for a son who has served in the persian gulf war twice and voiced the very same words I put in print this morning. ************YES AND THIS HOWEVER AFTER THE FACT, HE IS HOME SAFE, THANK GOODNESS BUT HOW DO YOU THINK COMMENTS LIKE THIS MAKE OUR YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN FEEL WHILE THEY ARE STILL FIGHTING AND DEFENDING US.************ As it was explained to him, war has one purpose and I stated that purpose. Did ya'll also know that our future wars are supposed to be fought by "remote control combatants" only and there won't be any real soldiers?*************THIS IS NOT THE CASE AT THE MOMENT AND HAS NOT BEEN OUR HISTORY.**************That's what our government told him when he was on his way to the Gulf the first time. I also have a brother who since being "lucky enough to come home from the Viet Nam war" wonders why he was ever put through that hxxxllll at the young age of 18 and where was the "appreciation" of the sacrifices he and so many others from this country showed when they came home?? Not that anyone ever spit on him, they just turned their backs and said welcome home, get over it!********* AND WOULD YOU HAVE BEEN ONE OF THEM, SINCE YOU ARE ASKING WHY AND FOR WHAT?*********** Unfortunately, it doesn't work out that way in real life.
Many of the Gulf war and Iraq war veteran's spend their time in and out of the psychic wards as a result of the horrors they live with every day.********** I'M AWARE OF THIS AND IT IS TERRIBLE.***********The guilt factor of why they survived and their comrades did not, is overwhelming and something they will never be able to get over.*********** NO THEY WILL CARRY THIS WITH THEM FOREVER AND THIS IS WHY WE DON'T NEED FOLKS ASKING WHY AND WHAT FOR WHILE OUR MEN AND WOMEN ARE FIGHTING***************I DID NOT say anything derogatory towards the article from the NY Times nor our servicemen and women who so proudly serve this country. I also clarified that I was not trying to make a political statement, just saddened when I see the continuing loss of life in our children, family and friends in the name of what?***********SUPPORT OUR TROOPS********** For this to continue repesents a senseless act to me********** SUPPORT OUR TROOPS WHO ARE THERE FOR YOU************** and SHAME on those of you who took it otherwise.******* I HAVE NO REASON TO BE SHAMEFUL, OUR TROOPS, PAST AND PRESENT, MEN AND WOMEN HAVE MY FULL SUPPORT 24/7*****************
| Reply by TitleGalCA on 8/5/06 9:04pm
Msg #137290
LkA
***********NO THEY WILL CARRY THIS WITH THEM FOREVER AND THIS IS WHY WE DON'T NEED FOLKS ASKING WHY AND WHAT FOR WHILE OUR MEN AND WOMEN ARE FIGHTING**********
Your last sentence was so right on. After all they have endured, right up to losing their lives to ensure our safety, the very people they are trying to protect question this sacrifice???
That is truly a sin, IMO.
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