Posted by BrendaTx on 1/11/06 11:26am
Msg #87579

OT - Redneck humor

Hello, is this here the Sheriff's Office?"

"Yes. What can I do for you?"
"I'm calling to report my neighbor, Virgil Smith. He's drillin' holes
in his farwood and hiding marijuana inside!"

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, the Sheriff & his deputies descend on Virgil's house.
They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they split
every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They sneer at Virgil and leave.

The phone rings at Virgil's house. "Hey, Virgil! This here is Floyd.
Did the Sheriff come?"

"Yeah!"

"Did they split yer farwood?"

"Yep!"

"Merry Christmas, Buddy!"

(Who says rednecks aren't real bright?!)

Reply by Charles_Ca on 1/11/06 12:18pm
Msg #87595

Hysterical! I've got neighbors like that! NM

Reply by CaliNotary on 1/11/06 12:37pm
Msg #87600

An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

http://www.joespc.com/carlos/redneck.htm

Reply by Ilona_OH on 1/11/06 1:22pm
Msg #87613

OMG!!!! I've never laughed so hard!!!

Reply by BrendaTx on 1/11/06 1:39pm
Msg #87614

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

I have never seen this before... and I loved it. Already redirected it to East Texas to my kin up thar where I got that 'un I jist posted. They a gonna like it. Even those gals named "Doylene" and "Foylene" and "Pauline" they have on their mailing list.

Pauline is Doylene's momma. Doylene's daddy is Doyle-T. She's lucky that they didn't name her Doylene T.

Foylene is just a popular name. No kin.

Reply by Charm_AL on 1/11/06 1:56pm
Msg #87616

LOL!!!...cute...n/m

Reply by Anonymous on 1/11/06 2:33pm
Msg #87625

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

When Ah lived in Jorja, mah neighbor was named Harolene, after her father, Harold.

Reply by christiSocal on 1/11/06 3:34pm
Msg #87630

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

My Grandmothers name was Pauline, Her son Paul married a Doylene. However they were not from Texas. Gram was originally from Missouri (they moved to Ok) and Doylene from Oklahoma. I was named after Corpus Christi, Texas. My dad was stationed there in the Navy. At least he didn't name me corpus! My kids always say we're redneck- I guess it's in the genes.

Reply by TulsaPRLGL on 1/11/06 8:18pm
Msg #87696

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

omg, I am also named after Corpus Christi!! I was born and raised there, and now live in Oklahoma, ohhhh the humor of it all!

Christina aka Christy

Reply by BrendaTx on 1/11/06 8:30pm
Msg #87698

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

Thank you soooo much for propping up that story, ChristiSocal. It's almost too much to believe. I looked back at that message I got the name game from. Remember, it's from East Tx...that means it's not addressed to Brenda...my uncle always puts Brenda Kay.

Two names must make a woman more valuable.

By the way, Doyle T is dead now...however, he caught Pauline in the arms of another man, picked up his shot gun and blew him to smithereens. (sp). Then, he loaded up the fellow and made a trip to the courthouse to turn himself in.

He was tried and acquitted. He and Pauline were married until he died.

That's what you call the pre-trial separation agreement not to separate. Pauline's pretty fortunate she did not get the full East Texas divorce.

Reply by TitleGalCA on 1/11/06 8:44pm
Msg #87700

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

I have never heard the name 'Doylene'. I thought you were joking when you posted it earlier, B.

Reply by TitleGalCA on 1/11/06 8:43pm
Msg #87699

Re: An oldie but goodie - Redneck Neighbor

OMG Cali, I laughed until I cried. Classic! - thanks for that.

Reply by Jimmy_FL on 1/11/06 4:39pm
Msg #87640

Thanks,that made my day:)

.........

Reply by christiSocal on 1/11/06 8:54pm
Msg #87703

names

My uncle Paul and aunt Doylene moved back to OK a few years ago (they were in cali) They are in Enid now. I can still remember getting fussed at by Doylene, I'd pronounce her name dor-lene. I guess it's a cali accent thing cause it happened to her alot. Really ticked her off :- ). Also, cool I'm not the only one grateful not to be named corpus ;-)