Posted by Sylvia_FL on 6/27/06 2:20pm
Msg #128959

OT -Political Humor - just to balance it out

A man enters a bar and orders a drink. The bar has a robot bartender. The robot serves him a perfectly prepared cocktail, and then asks him, "What's your IQ?" The man replies "150" and the robot proceeds to make conversation about global warming factors, quantum physics and spirituality, bio-mimicry, environmental interconnectedness, string theory, nanotechnology, and sexual proclivities. The customer is very impressed and thinks, "This is really cool."

He decides to test the robot. He walks out of the bar, turns around, and comes back in for another drink. Again, the robot serves him the perfectly prepared drink and asks him, "What's your IQ?" The man responds, "about 100." Immediately the robot starts talking, but this time, about football, NASCAR, baseball, supermodels, favorite fast foods, guns, and women's body parts.

Really impressed, the man leaves the bar and decides to give the robot one more test. He heads out and returns, the robot serves him and asks, "What's your IQ?" The man replies, "Er, 50, I think." And the robot says... real slowly, "So... is.. your... party... gonna... nominate... Hillary... for... president ???

Reply by BrendaTx on 6/27/06 2:24pm
Msg #128962

Re: OT -Political Humor -Another excellent Joke...

Hey, I am an Aggie (mom). We are the but of most jokes around here so I really have learned to judge a joke on content and humor value. I find this one funnier because I am a Republication, but I gotta admit that BRAZILIAN is priceless, too.

Reply by Merry_CA on 6/27/06 2:50pm
Msg #128967

Re: OT -Political Humor -Another excellent Joke...

The "BRAZILIAN" joke is the funniest I heard in a long time. As a Democrat I find the content of this joke interesting in that the 150 I.Q. is attributed to topics that we Democrats blabber on and on about all the time.

Reply by MistarellaFL on 6/27/06 2:53pm
Msg #128969

Re: OT -Political Humor -Another excellent Joke...

Both jokes are a HOOT, no matter which side of the fence you sit.
Thanks to both of you jokesters for your uplifting humor.
The board certainly has needed it this week.

Reply by Blueink_CA on 6/27/06 4:00pm
Msg #128983

While we're on the subject -

One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth.

But little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and make love with him for money."

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Johnny aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"

"No," the boy said, "He works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to secure the Nomination of Hillary Clinton in 2008, But I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

Reply by Sylvia_FL on 6/27/06 4:05pm
Msg #128984

That is a hoot Blueink - I am ROFLMAO n/m

Reply by TitleGalCA on 6/27/06 5:59pm
Msg #129038

Blueink...I LOVE that joke!!! n/m

Reply by John_NorCal on 6/27/06 4:43pm
Msg #129000

Won't hold it against you Brenda! jk n/m

Reply by dickb/wi on 6/27/06 4:21pm
Msg #128988

funny stuff sylvia...thanks for the laugh.......

Reply by Bob_Chicago on 6/27/06 4:21pm
Msg #128989

Religious Humor, but hopefully not as controversial as some

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to
>> convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from
>> the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He would have a
>> religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews
>> won, they could stay in Italy, if the Pope won, they would have to
>> leave.
>>
>> The Jewish people met and picked an aged, but wise Rabbi
>> Moishe to represent them in the debate. However, as Moishe spoke no
>> Italian, and the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they all agreed that it would
>> be a "silent" debate.
>>
>> On the chosen day, the Pope and Rabbi Moishe sat opposite
>> each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and
>> showed three fingers. Rabbi Moishe looked back and raised one finger.
>> Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. Rabbi Moishe pointed
>> to the ground where he sat. The Pope then brought out a communion
>> wafer and a chalice of wine. Rabbi Moishe pulled out an apple. With
>> that, the Pope stood up and declared that he was beaten, that Rabbi
>> Moishe was too clever, and that the Jews could stay.
>>
>> Later, the Cardinals met with the Pope, asking what had
>> happened. The Pope said, "First, I held up three fingers to represent
>> the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that
>> there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then, I waved
>> my finger to show him that God was all around us. He responded by
>> pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I
>> pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our
>> sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He had
>> me beaten and I could not continue."
>>
>> Meanwhile the Jewish community was gathered around Rabbi
>> Moishe. "How did you win the debate?" they asked. "I haven't a clue,"
>> said Moishe. "First he said to me that we had three days to get out of
>> Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that the whole
>> country would be cleared of Jews and I said to him, we're staying
>> right here." "And then what?" asked a woman. "Who knows?" said Moishe,
>> "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine."

Hope that everyone had a great EOM

Reply by John_NorCal on 6/27/06 4:42pm
Msg #128998

Re: Ok Then here goes....

Old Ishmael was on his deathbed. For days while he waited for death to take him, he kept insisting that he must convert to Catholicism.
In desperation his family called his lifelong friend, Abraham to speak with Ishmael.
Abraham asks of his dear friend, " Ishmael, what is this you want to be a Catholic. Why, why? All your life you've been a Jew! Why now?"
Ishmael looks at Abraham, and says with conviction, "Ahh, but it's better one of them should die instead of one of us. Isn't it?"

Reply by TitleGalCA on 6/27/06 6:01pm
Msg #129039

Good one John!! n/m