Posted by CarsonCityNV on 3/1/06 10:36pm
Msg #101224

Beyond Rude!

Anyone ever have a borrower act like a spoiled brat, sign his name with so much rage that the paper actually ripped, angrily flick the signed documents back at you and once the signing is over throw the pen at you and stomp away? I mean, this guy was BEYOND rude!

Reply by Ninna_La on 3/1/06 11:31pm
Msg #101230

Thank goodness these types of people are rare! I've had my share as well... I actually had one guy who told me that I was going to think he was a real butt by the time we got done and we had just started. Whereas I told him "I run into butts all the time.... I can handle it."

During the signing, the wife (an attorney) ended up asking me "did the title company take care of clearing our property to be mortgaged with the bankruptcy court?" Whereas I asked "Does the title company know you're in bankruptcy?".... (all the while I was thinking.... um, you're an attorney.... shouldn't you be on top of this?) She then claimed she told the lender. I called the title company and they were not aware and told me to stop and adjourn immediately. Needless to say, the husband was outraged (they were getting a considerable amount of cash back). Life is good... and what goes around, comes around.

Reply by CarsonCityNV on 3/1/06 11:46pm
Msg #101234

Unbelievable! And yes, the good ones far outweigh the baddies luckily. Certainly keeps life interesting! :-)

Reply by Anonymous on 3/2/06 12:52am
Msg #101243

Forgive me here.... I know I am being critical. But as a notary, you cannot allow your self to be treated badly. You are there solely as an impartial state mandated wittness. Nothing more. You are not someones footstool.
My friend, don't allow people to treat you badly..... When I had a signing like what you described happened to me. (It was with a drunk), I told the signer to either get his act together or we would adjourn the meeting. He stomped off in his drunken rage. And I went home a merry camper. Knowing I was going to be paid. And he was getting nothing but a hang over. Remember.... You as a notary cannot be bullied, yelled at, or treated badly. You are a state official.

Reply by SatomiCO on 3/2/06 7:52am
Msg #101280

Re: If he was drunk, you should have stopped the signing

immediately and not simply advised BO to get his act together.

Reply by MichiganAl on 3/2/06 1:13am
Msg #101245

You didn't say why he was upset? Was he upset with something you did or something the lender did?

I learned a good lesson from a seasoned veteran. When a borrower starts acting like that, you don't have to say a word and you don't have to get angry. Just smile, put your pen down, put your hands in your lap, and take a nice long pause. They get the message very quickly that you're going to wait until they're done with their tantrum beofre proceeding. They do it again, you pause even longer. The point is made without doing or saying anything you'd regret.

Reply by BrendaTx on 3/2/06 1:29am
Msg #101247

Re: Beyond Rude! - Exactly, Al...

It does work. Being quiet and just allowing those pregnant pauses can make a big point.

My late husband and I worked in the same building for a long time. I took breaks with his staff quite a bit. The ladies who worked for him said whenever they would get upset about something and start ranting he'd fold his hands and listen attentively...he would say nothing and there were big gaps of silence which would be the place HE should say something, but he wouldn't. I don't like it that he did that, but it was effective. I think he "controlled" his female staff's outbursts that way.--it's kind of a passive agressive maneuver, but it works like a charm. They would be terribly uncomfortable and stop being so upset...actually, I thought that was kind of a chicken-you-know-what tactic he used, but it worked exactly like you say it does. He just did not want to deal with whatever it was they wanted "fixed." A tantrum throwing bwr should get the point rather quickly.

(This thing my husband did never worked at home...he tried it a time or two, but it was not as effective as he'd hoped for with me.)

Reply by MichiganAl on 3/2/06 1:40am
Msg #101251

Re: Beyond Rude! - Exactly, Al...

I've given a few seminars on dealing with angry customers (yeah, me!). A classic mistake that people make is trying to solve a problem too quickly. If someone is ticked off, you have to let them vent and let their anger run it's course. Otherwise, even if you've solved their problem, you haven't allowed them to resolve their emotional state. You have to let them finish being irrational (thus, the pause). I wouldn't call it passive aggressive, it's text book problem resolution. But then again, we all know YOU are NOT text book.

Reply by RayC_TX on 3/2/06 1:32am
Msg #101249

I recieved a last min. signing tonight, had 45mins to drive 30 miles and print of 89 pages.
I GOT~ER DUN !! When i got there the folks were very nice all but the buyer.
Several times he got very sharp with his wife, glad it wasnt my wife Teef would have been missing!
He made several calls to the morgage company, rather brash with them.
His wife signed a few documents till it came to the Note. Her name was not on the note, several other places on documents her name did appear. Dispite my warning that Oversigning would certainly be better than undersigning, and that I was not an attorney, He TOOK ON THAT ROLL, and determined that SHE WAS NOT NEEDED TO SIGN THOSE.
I am not a HEAD SHRINKER EITHER, but from an outsider viewing the situation, it seems clearly that the Morgage or the title company didnt want this fellow in thier office I COULD SEE WHY !!!
Since he took the bull by the horns, if required I may have to go get her signature on those.
I think a certain amount of "buyer attitude" could probably have been warted off with a touch more prep time ..... I could have laid those papers out "TAGGED" and shuffled them through with everything falling into place.
Then again what do you do with a Irrate RUDE DUDE WITH A TUDE ??

Reply by BrendaTx on 3/2/06 4:52am
Msg #101256

Little Grasshopper...Ray...The Pearly Shield is up...

It's hermetically sealing things up around you before people start waking up and trying to make chopped grasshopper out of you. There are a couple of little errors in your thinking but I responded in msg #101254 - no one will give you any crap...but it is very important that you always wear your pearls to keep the shield activated. You must keep those on to be safe while you are a newbie at this fun fest.

Reply by SatomiCO on 3/2/06 8:06am
Msg #101288

In this biz you will run into all types of people. What you describe as BO being sharp with his wife, may be normal day-to-day routine in their own lives. It is not our place to define how two people, especially husband and wife "should" act.

Reply by FlaMac on 3/2/06 7:01am
Msg #101266

Lots and ladies too:) Immaturity isn't gender specific n/m

Reply by LawrenceOK on 3/2/06 7:27am
Msg #101275

Re: Beyond Rude! In my opinion-

this borrower, being in such an angry and enraged state as to tear documents and throw objects (regardless of who is at fault) was clearly signing under duress. As a notary public, it would have been my duty under state law to stop the signing. Under Oklahoma law, I can not notarize any document for any person showing ANY signs of duress including anger or outrage.

Reply by Charm_AL on 3/2/06 8:04am
Msg #101285

Go back to your basic notary laws!

Angry people ripping and throwing stuff are signing under duress...adjourn the signing

Drunk people should not even begin to be allowed to start signing.

Any person signing has to be coherent and know what they are signing.

Reply by CarsonCityNV on 3/2/06 9:01am
Msg #101321

He wasn't drunk, drugged or anything like that. Matter of fact, when we spoke earlier in the day he was super nice. BUT..........Mrs. set the time for the signing, we met at her office, she brought little 10-year old son, and evidently when Mr. discovered that he had to leave his house to drive to her place of work and it was during the time of one of his favourite TV shows and that he was going to miss it -- that's what set him off. Mrs. kept telling him to cool it, etc., and little 10-year old son was cowering behind her. This guy must be a real tyrant at home. Anyway, I've been in this business a loooooonnnnnnngggggg time and learned long ago it sure does take all kinds! Just had to vent a little. Thanks for the feedback everybody! Appreciate it.

Reply by eXpedN_TX on 3/2/06 9:57am
Msg #101335

That angry man may want to invest in Tivo. LOL!

Reply by AngelinaAZ on 3/2/06 10:10am
Msg #101345

Great Advice! Best Investment EVER!!! n/m