Posted by Jenny_CA on 5/4/06 2:27am
Msg #117647

CaliNotary...with sympathy.

Celebrate your friend, celebrate your life.....we do not make time for death but death makes time for us.

At times like these I am extremely short with words, never really know what to say. I don't know you personally but want you to know that I wish you well.

Reply by PAW on 5/4/06 7:35am
Msg #117660

Cali, let me add my condelences. I too no not what words to say at times like this. I can only rely on my past experiences and offer to you that one must celebrate life with an acknowledgment of gifts that were ours as a result of the life we memorialize. L'cheiim

Reply by PAW on 5/4/06 7:41am
Msg #117661

Oops, typo (need more coffee)

Should read "I too know not what words to say ..."

Reply by LisaWI on 5/4/06 8:37am
Msg #117673

Re: Touching Your Soul

I had lost a good friend 2 years ago not realizing the impact she had on my life until after. Although I appreciated her as a friend I never fully felt that friendship until after her death. She had without a doubt touched my soul. Her death was not sudden, she was dying slowly with a rare liver disease. Death did not scare her, she was a very simplistic person and gave her right arm to anyone who needed it. Why am I writing this, your probably asking..... Because her death and the life that she led, made me think about about those same things that you are more deeply where before it was just a mere thought. The funny and great thing is the gift she gave of friendship while she was alive is still alive and I feel it all the time. Moral of the story----she left me and others with an understanding of true love, the importance of life, and most of all the importance of our existance to others in life.

Reply by BrendaTx on 5/4/06 8:21am
Msg #117665

**one must celebrate life with an acknowledgment of gifts that were ours as a result of the life we memorialize. L'cheiim**

Paul, that is a very beautiful thing to share. I was writing a piece about my grandfather (step) who passed awhile back - funny, but this is very timely for me and I appreciate you stating it. Thank you.

Reply by BrendaTx on 5/4/06 8:10am
Msg #117663

Dear, dear friend...Grief, real grief is something I did not know until I was 40. I would really love to be there with you to hug you and to just sit around and be quiet. Please know that my sorrow is there with you as I do love you for just making me laugh...for emailing with me on some very lonely holidays...and for the professional appreciation I have for you. I am hopeful one day you will be in Texas, or I will be in California and I can meet you and give you a hug...spend some time getting to know you in 3-D. Thanks for letting us know. Love to you, Brenda

Reply by Ilona_OH on 5/4/06 8:25am
Msg #117667

We all feel your loss and stand in tribute beside

you. May prayers and cyberspace arms surround you with love.

Reply by TheresaCA on 5/4/06 9:16am
Msg #117684

Yes, death makes time for us.

I had a friend that I normally talk on the phone because she is a very busy single mom. Had two jobs and works as a property manager at the apartment that she lives in, technically 3 jobs to support her daughter in college. I got a call one afternoon from her daughter letting me know that she passed away due to cancer. We always talk but I guess she never told anyone how severe her sickness was, not even at her own mom. She hid it well and would just say she needs to go somewhere to her employer. Her employer found faxes from the doctor about the results of exams and so forth hidden in her desk.

I took the time to see her family and friends at the funeral.

Reply by Brenda/CA on 5/4/06 11:24am
Msg #117710

Wishing you comfort in your time of pain and sorrow. I am sorry about the loss of your loved one.

Reply by Tina_MA on 5/4/06 11:45am
Msg #117718

You will always have your friend with you through the memories you have.

Hold your memories close, and remember often -- hopefully with a smile.

Time does help to lessen the hurt, and the memories will keep you company for a lifetime.

My deepest sympathy for your loss.

Reply by Charm_AL on 5/4/06 11:54am
Msg #117721

Thanks for your best wishes and I know exactly what you're going through. I've never been sick or hosptized in my life and after what I've been going thruogh, I've been feeling REAL mortal lately. A humbling experience and it ain't over.
Sorry for your loss.

Reply by Bonnie_CO on 5/4/06 12:09pm
Msg #117730

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. That is hard! My thoughts are with you. Celebrate your friends life and all that they were to you. Know that a lot of us here care.

Reply by cmd_NH on 5/4/06 2:53pm
Msg #117791

I lost two of my best friends within a short amount of time so I know what you are feeling. They are still in my heart and the hurt doesn't go away completely, but the memories of the good times we had together pull me through. I know they went to a good place and that my son has two of the best watching over him and helping to keep him safe. Hang in there Cali...you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Reply by CaliNotary on 5/4/06 5:32pm
Msg #117840

Thanks everybody

The whole thing is just completely surreal. I don't think the true reality of the situation will hit me until I'm at the funeral.

One of the weirdest things about the whole thing is the last email that I received from him, on Wednesday of last week. He had sent the followng poem out to a bunch of people (and no, I swear I'm not making this up just to make the story better)

THE DASH


I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.

He reffered to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning....to the end

He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears

But he said what mattered most of all
was the DASH between those years

For that DASH represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth

And now only those who loved her
know what that little time is worth

For it matters not how much we own
the cars...the house...the cash

What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our DASH

So think about this long and hard
are there things you'd like to change?

Because you never know how much time is left
that can still be rearranged

If we could just slow down enough
to consider what's true and real

And always try to understand
the way other people feel

And be less quick to anger
and show appreciation more

And love the people in our lives
like we've never loved before

If we treat each other with respect
and more often wear a smile

Remembering that this special DASH
might only last a little while

So when your eulogy is being read
with your life's actions to rehash

Would you be proud of the things they say
and how you spend YOUR DASH?

author - unknown

Reply by Lisa Kimmel on 5/4/06 6:09pm
Msg #117845

Re: Now thats Heavy!! Wow! NM n/m