Posted by reba on 1/9/13 9:25am
Msg #449575

Your thoughts..

Last night I had a simple deed signing, 1 person, 2 docs to be signed and notarized. The location of the home was not in the best area, but I don't like to prejudge. As I did expect an elderly woman answered the door and welcomed me in. The home was extremely cluttered to the point where she directed me to a slim path to get to the LR table while she took another. When she left me at the table to get her ID, her son (about 25-30) came in the LR with a very messy t-shirt that almost seemed like there was some marking that my imagination felt looked like it had dried blood on it. He was a very much a mess, and a little erratic in his speaking. He asked inquiring questions about the document his mother was about to sign and I did not give him any info. I told him that I was not aware of the specifics of this transaction and that his mother could speak with her contact person with any questions. As he began to get frustrated with my lack of information I began to feel a bit uncomfortable and in my head began to try to figure out an escape route if needed. There was a LOT of clutter. I'm sure he meant to harm, but as I sat there the thought ran through my head of what would I do if something went "wrong" in this house. The mother came back, gave me a NYS Lerners Permit that expired in 2000! GEEZ! So unable to accept, I asked if she could find any other ID. She seemed as if she did not know where it was, but left me again to find it. I was really hoping this would move along quicker, I did not like the son. She finally comes back with a valid PASSPORT! Why didn't we just start with that? The woman was very nice to me and her son was an odd fellow. Fortunately, he was distracted by a call from her other son. This whole signing took about 20 minutes, but it was the longest 20 minutes of unease. I reviewed the docs twice, to make sure all was complete, packed my stuff quickly, thanked the woman and left the house. Did not leave a business card, left no docs with my name or stamp on them and ran to FedEx office. My point is that this was my first situation Ive encountered in this business where I felt uneasy and could see (in my head) a possible safety risk. My question is, when encountered with situations like this once you get in the house I wonder how others deal with it without offending the homeowner? Do any of you carry any type of pepper spray or something? I handled in a professional manner, but wondered how others would have handled.

Reply by 101livescan on 1/9/13 9:37am
Msg #449580

Probably a harmless individual who just appeared to be dangerous. 911 in your phone, gives your exact location to first responders. Mace? with that comes a lot of responsibility.

I've only had one encounter where I arrived at the location for signing and did not want to get out of my car. A known gang neighborhood, six big men dressed in black hoodies. A cold winter evening around 6pm, so it was dark and no street lights, no porch lite. They had a lock on the gate, no steps, only stepping stones up a grade. I was afraid I might fall and break my neck or worse.

Hard money loan so people wouldn't lose the family home to foreclosure. It was a mess. three generations signing docs, need I say more. I couldn't wait to get outta there. I don't go to certain neighborhoods any more. Someone needs to know where you are at all times.

Reply by Julie/MI on 1/9/13 10:02am
Msg #449581

turn the tables how did they sum you up?

Stranger comes into your mothers home with a legal document. Stranger seems a little uneasy and won't answer questions about the legal document..complete nervous stranger and you think they were out of line because they had clutter and he wasn't dressed in an izod shirt and cleanly shaved?

Reply by reba on 1/9/13 10:12am
Msg #449583

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

I was very professional in my appearance and manner. I did not answer details about the deed because I did not know the background and it was his mothers business not his. The mother (deed signer) did not ask me questions and was comfortable with what she was signing. I did not appear nervous or judgmental towards these people. As I stated, the mother was a nice woman. I myself am a woman so forgive me for having concern about a guy coming in the room with what appeared to be a blood stained t-shirt (which I did not act upon-had you read my post). I wanted to know how others handle situations where they are put in where they may feel uncomfortable...

Reply by 101livescan on 1/9/13 10:13am
Msg #449585

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

I would have felt much the same, Reba.

Reply by Shan/CA on 1/9/13 3:17pm
Msg #449661

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

We have to be aware of our surroundings at all times. I'd rather be safe than sorry any day, I want to go back home to my family. As someone else stated, someone should always know where your signing is. In California I have a CCW, but if I feel an area is rumored or known to be unsafe, I'm not going.

Reply by sueharke on 1/9/13 11:25am
Msg #449611

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

I might have answered his question as "this is a confidential issue that I cannot discuss with you. Please ask your mother about this and why I am here."

Reply by Julie/MI on 1/9/13 12:38pm
Msg #449625

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

Maybe he thought you were ripping his mother off and he didn't want her giving her passport to "very professional" person as some think the well dressed banker types are ripping them off.

Reply by reba on 1/9/13 3:02pm
Msg #449653

Re: turn the tables how did they sum you up?

I'm not finding your response helpful.

Reply by jba/fl on 1/9/13 3:16pm
Msg #449660

She was giving you another viewpoint that son may have held. n/m

Reply by reba on 1/9/13 5:10pm
Msg #449679

Re: She was giving you another viewpoint that son may have held.

I have completed MANY signings and this was the only that has ever given me concern. Understand there are additional "things" about this situation and person, that made me feel this way but I did not feel it was necessary to go into such detail and the response did not address my question. I did explain to the son and his mother that she was welcome to contact her person if she had any questions. She did not imply that this information was any of his business or concern. My intention was to find out how people handle a situation as such once they are in the house.

Reply by desktopfull on 1/9/13 10:02am
Msg #449582

Since 2003, I don't go to risky or dangerous neighborhoods ever. It's not worth your life to notarize a document or any kind. They can either meet me at a safe location or find someone that lives in their neighborhood.

I was in the middle of a closing and suddenly there were pop, pop, pop sounds, both of the borrower's grabbed my arms and pulled me to the floor under the table. Before I could say a word both of them said "drive-by." I stayed on the floor until they signaled it was okay to get up, I finished the closing and have never accepted another one from that area of town again. All I could think of (didn't verbalize) was you're refinancing instead of moving, Wow! Amazing what some accept as normal life.

Reply by Les_CO on 1/9/13 10:32am
Msg #449589

I live in a totally different area so I really can’t answer your question, except we get very little money for the work we do. I would never complete an appointment where I felt threatened; it’s just not worth the risk or mental anguish. As far as 911, if there is a legitimate threat they may find your body when they get there. Mace/ pepper spray is useless and I think illegal in NY. If I was uncomfortable at the door before I went in I’d say sorry, I forgot something in my car, when I got to the car I’d call and cancel, and state my reasons. Or I would not go in the first place. I’m not easily intimidated, and I have a CCP, and there are areas in Denver that I don’t go into. JMO

Reply by jba/fl on 1/9/13 10:34am
Msg #449591

Answer your phone (it is on vibrate which is why they don't hear it)...state "my phone is blotchy in here and I am stepping out to take this call from the hiring party." Remove yourself, take a deep breath and stay close to the door afterwards. I would predial 911, but I think everyone hearing that I am talking to the hiring party would be sufficient.

Reply by MW/VA on 1/9/13 11:06am
Msg #449603

I've only been in a couple of "uncomfortable" situations.

They always say to trust to gut. If you feel something is wrong it's best to not go in or find a way to excuse yourself (emergency phone call, etc.). I'm wondering how you think something like pepperspray would help in a situation like that?

Reply by reba on 1/9/13 11:30am
Msg #449612

Re: I've only been in a couple of "uncomfortable" situations.

I appreciate everyone's response (minus 1). I'm not saying that pepper spray is a solution, but in this one instance things did not feel right or comfortable and wondered I how others handle once inside the house.

Reply by emilysigns on 1/9/13 3:08pm
Msg #449655

Re: I've only been in a couple of "uncomfortable" situations.

I can understand being in an uncomfortable situation like that, fortunately I have never been in that position, but I have wondered what I would do if I were.

I always make sure that my husband knows where I am going and when I anticipate being home, just in case...and I carry a heavy mag light in my bag. Would I actually whip it out and beat someone with it if I needed to defend myself? Not entirely certain, I think it's more of a warm fuzzy measure. (and practical for dark walks back to the car.)

I just try to be very aware of my surroundings and all that.

Reply by LKT/CA on 1/9/13 9:11pm
Msg #449708

Martial Arts

I've taken martial arts...jiu jitsu. When you learn martial arts, it gives you a level of confidence to know you can "take care of things". Well, with me, instead of dred and fear, I'm sizing up the person and in my mind, already applying the technique that will take them down. If nothing happens, great. Confidence and mental prepping replaces fear.

Jiu jitsu is a perfect martial art for women, as you don't need strength to defeat someone. Leverage and technique is the power you have to defend and/or defeat. Also, for an offense, there are at least 10 ways to respond, depending on the size of the opponent. When I first started, I'd sit in on the advanced class and watch. There was a lady who'd been training for about 7 years. She was barely 5 feet tall. She easily took down a guy double in weight and nearly 7 feet tall. I was AMAZED, to say the least.

Take martial arts.

I will be taking Tae Kwon Do shortly, but jiu jitsu is THE martial arts of women or anyone skinny and scrawny. And it is a great work out - better than weight lifting and better than aerobics.

Reply by BrendaTx on 1/9/13 9:45pm
Msg #449710

Good suggestion.

Need a good work out, too.

Reply by GOLDGIRL/CA on 1/9/13 9:53pm
Msg #449712

Wow, Lisa!

I'm staying on your good side!

I'm Impressed!

Reply by linda/ca on 1/10/13 3:36am
Msg #449740

Re: Martial Arts

"I will be taking Tae Kwon Do shortly, but jiu jitsu is THE martial arts of women or anyone skinny and scrawny. And it is a great work out - better than weight lifting and better than aerobics."

While I agree with LKT/CA, I still love aerobics/Jazzercise because you can't beat it for stamina and endurance. Working out to music is an extra bonus because I love to dance and the music keeps me going.

While I have been in situations where I have felt I need to be on guard. I have never felt intimidated. Although I have had some who was perhaps trying to intimidate me; I keep a professional demeanor yet they can tell I am not easy prey and "not in the mood" so they start behaving themselves.

Reply by linda/ca on 1/10/13 3:57am
Msg #449742

Re: Martial Arts

As an aside; upon reflection, not that I run into the situation often, however, I have come across one or two very angry borrower's over the years and when possible, more often my style is to try to bring some humor into the situation and that usually calm things down and create a very relaxed atmosphere the rest of my visit.