Posted by HisHughness on 9/23/13 12:12am
Msg #485578
Recurring themes
TOP 10 ORIGINAL POSTS IN DISCUSS WORK THREADS
No. 10: Hello, I am a newbie. How do I get closings, and do I tie my right shoe or my left shoe first? Also, would you consider adopting me till I start bringing in $100,000 annually next month?
No. 9: What kind of printer do you veteran agents prefer? The signing services keep asking me if I have a laser printer. Do I have to have a computer to go with it?
No. 8: I have not been paid by the Dewey Cheatem Signing Service; they owe me $300 for 10 closings. Does anyone have the address for the Attorney General of the United States?
No. 7: I think all we signing agents should stick together against those predatory signing services. Myself, I refuse to pay them more than $15 to let me do a signing while I’m learning, unless it is less than 10 miles from my home.
No. 6: Signing services are roach droppings from roaches that have been eating my ex-spouse’s cooking.
No. 5: XYZ doesn’t know what it’s talking about. They're about as effective at advising notaries as Jon Gosselin would be as a marriage counselor.
No. 4: A title company is requiring me to get an XYZ background check. Does anyone know if they check the sex offender website for my state?
No. 3: This belongs in Leisure. Those folks will laugh at anything, including <your> buffalo snot.
No. 2: This belongs in Just Politics, with all the other fringe far right, nazi, fascist, conservative, reactionary crap.
And the No. 1 original post that kicks off Discuss Work threads:
No. 1: You are all meanies, and I hope a badger runs up your anus.
TOP 10 RESPONSES TO ORIGINAL POSTS IN DISCUSS WORK
No. 10: Google SOX. Send them all your information. You might also want to forward the accumulated information to Nigerian widows who want to send you money, in the event the SOX connection doesn’t work out.
No. 9: Veteran agents such as Bob_Chicago long ago settled on any dot matrix printer as the best, backed up by a mimeograph machine. The only problem with that setup, Bob says, is that it drowns out the sound from his 8-track player.
No. 8: When you reach the U.S. Attorney General, please ask if he would be interested in a class action suit against Nigerian widows.
No. 7: Sounds like you’re on the right track. You may want to consider claiming SOX as a dependent on your income tax also.
No. 6: Calling some signing services “roach droppings” is an insult to roaches.
No. 5: You’re right, but it’s talking nonsense all the way to the bank. Looked at the size of <your> account lately?
No. 4: Don’t worry about it. For some signing services, hiring sex offenders would be an upgrade.
No. 3: It wasn’t a joke, blockhead. Besides, with all the pet videos being posted there, Leisure has all the attraction of a litter box nowadays.
No. 2: Don’t tell me where my posts belong, you leftwing, socialist, communist bloodsucker.
And the No. 1 response to the No. 1 original post:
No. 1: I’m sorry; I just don’t have time to tell you that you’re an idiot who doesn’t deserve to live. My anus is itching something horrible.
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