** And is it up to me to let the lender/escrow etc know about the missing docs a or wait till they tell me? **
Jessica, while it's not your responsibility to draw up the docs, you should make sure that all of the required documents are in the package. If they are not, then you should notify the title company.
I had a situation just a couple of days ago where the signature page of the Note was missing. I didn't notice it until I was at the borrowers. I had them sign the first page anyway. I notified the signing service of it, and they notified the title company.
The signing service emailed the page to me the next day, I had the borrowers sign it, and returned it to the title company. I had already dropped off the docs, but I was able to get the signature page to them so that all of the docs arrived at the same time. They'll probably never tell you, but they appreciate it when you can cover for them like that. Good luck.
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