So nice to see a grown-up response here. 
One more thought... It may be technically true that someone who responds in kind to a provocation from a "bully" may not fit the definition (as quoted above) of a bully themselves. However, when responses directly address the person doing the bullying, those comments are neither mature nor helpful, especially when they also become offensive and insulting. It accomplishes nothing except escalating the conflict and lowering oneself to their level. As we've seen, the exchange becomes something more like what we'd expect to hear on a playground from children. And it takes two to tango - if nasty comments get ignored, there's nothing to respond to and the conflict ends.
IMO, the mature behavior is to first just "walk away". Then take a long, hard look at what's being said, read between the lines to see if there's any value or truth hidden among all the nastiness, There often is some kernel there, but most people tend to immediately dismiss mean remarks as baseless. (Of course, sometimes they are.) But the person who can learn and grow from someone else's negative comments is likely to earn respect from others. Responding with more attacks, however, nearly always lowers one's esteem among their peers (i.e. observers/readers) to the level of the "bully".
OK, off my soapbox...  |
