..,. I'd like to know how you mobile notaries for whom it is dangerous to be driving around at night on icy, snowy dirt roads, no curbs, gutters or street lights, manage. Even then, the worst is yet to come: Driving up (or down) steep, narrow private roads with so much snow you can't see the edges to borrowers' dimly lit property which is covered with icy snow and where it is too easy to slip and fall, BUT they still expect you to come to their house cos their LO, who has never seen them or their property but is sitting under a palm tree in FL, told them somebody would come to their house. and wow how good is that, they're thinking?
Well, it won't be me, so what's a couple of good lines that nicely says that as much as I'd love to come to your house, I am risking life and limb (the stories I could tell you of people in my neck o' the woods who have lost their life in falls or are keeping ortho surgeons in land-office business repairing torn rotator cuffs, replacing knee caps, patching cracked hips and broken wrists, etc). I always suggest we meet at the nearest whatever closest to their home off the main highway (which is usually plowed) , but some of them seem unhappy about that. If they won't budge, I'll turn back the job, and the SS can find a big husky burly guy with an all-wheel Ram 1500 ecodiesel crew cab with studded snow tires and a big fat scope light to get up their snow-covered stairs (every house here is raised ranch) in the dark.
Incidentally, many sensible borrowers right off the bat tell me not to come to their house cos it's too dangerous, and they don't carry enough insurance to patch me up. Bless them. Oh, and then there are the ones who tell me I'll never make it to their property even with 4-wheel and snow tires, so park at the third pine tree on the left, and they'll come down and get me in some sort of crazy vehicle like a gondola or ski-mobile and we'll ride in that to their house. Are they kidding? Sadly no. Unbelievable! I've never come up with good lines to counter that except "No Thank You, that's not going to happen." So, any "meet me somewhere else cos I'm not slippin 'n' sliding and trippin on your property in the dark" good lines? |
